How much about this fucking WAR should I tell my young son?

[DirtDawg]

My son just made me cry. He was asking about the war in Iraq. Led into the conversation from talking about dinosaurs, asking me wbout what happens to all the concentrations of organic chemicals that life collects, after a cataclism and how petroleum is formed ... blah blah ... we get to the war and he is under the assumption, from school, that the war is over and WE are re-building the country of Iraq. "It's good that the war is over", he said.
I completely lost it!
I need to talk to him a lot more, but I don't know where to start. I was becoming emotional and I did not want him to see my weakness or how the subject, in regard to his life, affects me. I gave him a quick change of subject and ditched him, while I bounced outside to reset.

When I was in control, I came back in and my daughter, who had been playing with her kitty in her room, but hearing, asked, "Daddy, what does it mean that the war is over?"

I don't know what to say. How much should I tell them?

How much detail about politics can an eight year old grasp?  ... or a six year old? Is it time to explore more deeply the nature of humankind, with them?

Anybody got anything to add to my fears.



EDIT:
I know I said I cried, but it was actually that I stopped breathing and had trouble speaking and my face turned red from everything from being caught off guard, unprepared to absolute rage. Containing it was difficult, but I tried. It's still a "cry", though, from an overswelling of conflicting emotions.

[Calandale]

I think that he's probably old enough to
face a certain amount of truth here. That
the war IS over, but now we have to pay
some of the consequences for taking over
another country. And those consequences
seem to mean continued fighting, until we
give up.

[Pyraxis]

Um, the idea that they're probably well aware of your weakness? I knew exactly what it meant when my father would abruptly leave the room, clearing his throat.

With my complete and utter lack of parenting experience though, I'm not sure what's the best approach, except maybe to give whatever info they ask for, while watching for signs of upset-ness on their part and knowing when to stop and offer comfort.

[Calandale]

Yeah. But make sure you have your own
emotions in check when you explain it.
Your anger will upset them more than
any words that you can use.

[DirtDawg]

I don't know whether to be more pissed at the school, again or What The Fuck!

I am so happy with the way some aspects of the kids schooling are going, yet another BYTE from the BullShit side of the rightwing elements and I'm finding it hard to ignore.

[Pyraxis]

You can't protect people from being exposed to bullshit, but you can teach them how to detect and interpret it.

[DirtDawg]

Um, the idea that they're probably well aware of your weakness? I knew exactly what it meant when my father would abruptly leave the room, clearing his throat.

With my complete and utter lack of parenting experience though, I'm not sure what's the best approach, except maybe to give whatever info they ask for, while watching for signs of upset-ness on their part and knowing when to stop and offer comfort.

I can't tell you how many levels of weakness I gave away before I bolted, but it was only for about a minute that I was out there and I was right back. We talked a bit more, but he was overloaded and crawled into his "drawing" shell. We will continue, later. I totally blew him away with my breakdown. The damage is done, but he is a smart kid and very resilient. We will talk again, about this and soon.

As far as my parenting approach ... I have always admitted to being a fallable human with the same weaknesses as he feeels and I'm sure he is more sensitive to my fluctuating state as a result.

[Litigious]

I don't know whether to be more pissed at the school, again or What The Fuck!

I am so happy with the way some aspects of the kids schooling are going, yet another BYTE from the BullShit side of the rightwing elements and I'm finding it hard to ignore.

You can always move to Sweden. Here they'll blame the entire war and Israel-Palestine conflict on the US and Israel in the schools and call the Iraqi and Palestinian terrorists "freedom fighters" or at least "resistance fighters"...

[DirtDawg]

You can't protect people from being exposed to bullshit, but you can teach them how to detect and interpret it.

I know, but I am stunned to see what an amazing erection of nonsense I already have to tear down, in order to teach him anything of substance. The school has bveen moving much faster than I have, on this subject.

[Pyraxis]

I can't tell you how many levels of weakness I gave away before I bolted, but it was only for about a minute that I was out there and I was right back. We talked a bit more, but he was overloaded and crawled into his "drawing" shell. We will continue, later. I totally blew him away with my breakdown. The damage is done, but he is a smart kid and very resilient. We will talk again, about this and soon.

That would be the difference then, I expect. You come back.

[DirtDawg]

I don't know whether to be more pissed at the school, again or What The Fuck!

I am so happy with the way some aspects of the kids schooling are going, yet another BYTE from the BullShit side of the rightwing elements and I'm finding it hard to ignore.

You can always move to Sweden. Here they'll blame the entire war and Israel-Palestine conflict on the US and Israel in the schools and call the Iraqi and Palestinian terrorists "freedom fighters" or at least "resistance fighters"...

I want my son to know the same things that you and I know, but I am busy trying to give him valuable, usable, productive skills in coping and learning to understand what eh is perceiving in his environment and how to be independent and the school has decided, without reviewing it with ME, that he should be exposed to the political problems abroad.
They are clouding his sense of priority, while I'm not looking.

[McGiver]

i always just address all their questions as bluntly and honestly as possible.

i figure that they will find out anyways that life is not a fair game and i don't want them to ever think that their daddy is a liar.  becuse i want them to trust that they can come to me with any problem that might come up.

[DirtDawg]

I can't tell you how many levels of weakness I gave away before I bolted, but it was only for about a minute that I was out there and I was right back. We talked a bit more, but he was overloaded and crawled into his "drawing" shell. We will continue, later. I totally blew him away with my breakdown. The damage is done, but he is a smart kid and very resilient. We will talk again, about this and soon.

That would be the difference then, I expect. You come back.

Your father didn't? That's terrible. What did you do?


... I mean, right then, when you were standing there, all hallowed out from your fathers extreme show of humanity and the weaknesses it implies?.

[Pyraxis]

That would be the difference then, I expect. You come back.

Your father didn't? That's terrible. What did you do?

... I mean, right then, when you were standing there, all hallowed out from your fathers extreme show of humanity and the weaknesses it implies?.

In the particular case I'm thinking of, my mother (who'd also been involved in the discussion) attempted to continue it for a few more minutes, and out-calmed me, so I went crying and running off to my respective corner and didn't bring up the subject with them again.

[McGiver]

and the school has decided, without reviewing it with ME, that he should be exposed to the political problems abroad.
They are clouding his sense of priority, while I'm not looking.

this is pure america is great propaganda.

when my kids come home and tell me that george bush is our leader i tell them that he isn't.  he only serves the interests of a select few and that he stole the election.

by the age og eight, my daughters have a rough understanding of why they should question their government.