Author Topic: Intensity Guide for Newbies: take two  (Read 5790 times)

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Offline Al Swearegen

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Intensity Guide for Newbies: take two
« on: June 01, 2013, 03:35:35 AM »
Hey, hey , hey newbie. Welcome aboard. a new and perhaps intimidating forum, don't worry. You will fit in, in no time and your Uncle Al will help.

Here are some tips as to who is who and what

Callouts. They are really a meet and greet and of no real consequence. When we like someone and want to discuss it with them we "call out" to them. "Hey dog breath your posting style sucks" or "Hey your opinion on religion sucks retard". We all respond very well to such claims and that is the "call out" section.

Now some of the personalities.

DayGlowRandy is the best of us. Put simply, he is the wisest, most witty, intellectual and sensible of all of us. Whilst I can't divulge his actual name, I can tell you that both his parents are nobel prize winners, and with the fantastic strides he makes in scientific research, he will likely follow suit. Now after a long absence, the Prodigal son has returned.

McMorrison is a elusive pessemistic poster here. He is also the founder here. Years ago he was in the same college dorm as Alex
Plank. Alex wanted to make a site for all aspies and McMorrison wanted to make a site for all aspies obsessed  in "My Little Pony: Friendship is magic". Alex created WrongPlanet and McMorrison created Intensitysquared. We think McMorrison did better.

Cassanova Frankenstein is a great believer in the power of non-resistance. He is a New Age Alternative who lives in a commune. He seeks to deliver peace and harmony to the world. As a Buddhist Vegan he appreciates the beauty deep in each person and living creature.

El Presidente is a quiet and reserved Muslim scholar. He is not an aggressive man and has a quiet and respectful manner. He likes all of us infidels. Why ought he judge? It is only Allah that will answer our sins with horrible, screaming agonising eternal torture. Live and let live is what he says.

Nile is what we call, a "little person". It is rude to call him a dwarf. Nile is very self-conscious about his body and in particular his penis. A tip for the ladies, do not tell someone like Nile that it is not the size that counts whilst laughing. Poor Nile. Sorry to dredge this up little fella, just trying to be thorough to the newbies.

Butterflies suffers from Tourettes and this unfortunate condition has caused her to occasionally textually waffle on this board. She bravely fights off any efforts to help her because she cannot change herself and ought not for others. Her carers only give her limited internet use each month. You will not see much of her

Adam is allergic to animal hair and such issues are a sore point for Adam. I would stay well clear of any approach to dogs, cats, turtles, rabbits...you know pets entirely. Also do not mention religion, he is a fundamental Christian from the bible belt. Fire and Brimstone and the thoughts of his enemies getting tortured for eternity gets him off

Odeon is the owner. He is not that bright and a soft touch here. In fact as a general exercise in laughs give it to him and watch him flounder. It is fun. All of us do this.

Skyblue is an artist. She does this part time. She is a retired model and has a home in Sochi, Russia. She has a stunning body best here against fierce competition. She travels extensively and lives in luxury.

Jack is a member of the SAS. His physique puts most of us to shame. Though sometimes a little understated on here, it is in the back of our minds that he could kill us rather too easily and without much remorse.

SG1008 is an actor. He was one of the teenage mutant ninja turtles and more recently in Lord of the Rings as one of the dwarf extras. He enjoys practicing weapon mastery and playing the ukulele in his spare time. He is a Capitalist and A great supporter of government invasions and war mongering.

Calavera is a highly religious person. He has over many years drifted from one secular religion to another as the truth of god seemed out of his grasp. Now he has found his best fit and living a strict secular life with a denomination of Christianity that is strict and demanding and he is the type of person for it. He will textually rip anyone to pieces for arguing in any topic that cross the boundaries of his Christian principles....even inadvertently. be careful.

Oh there is also CouldbeCousin who is a real tearaway. She doesn't post much but when she does watch out. Nasty piece of work and in league with HykeasWell. Be wary of those two. These two are really the Bonnie and Clyde of the forum. Do not misjudge the outward happy and gentle humour for that. They are the sharks of the forum and wait til they see blood in the water so to speak and they will rip you to pieces.

Rage is actually a quite introverted fellow. He designs childrens' toys and has secured a profitable existence in the children plush toy market. He is passionate about politics and a staunch Republican. He has yet to miss a Sunday at church.

Queen Victoria is pure evil. There is little that escapes her notice here and she will take whatever you hold dear and use it against you in frightening ways. Evil I tell you.

Lutra is a passionate and highly emotional individual. You will often find Lutra in the thick of debates arguing strongly as to the deepest passions of his enormous heart. He is an activist by heart and nature.

Mia Wallace is actually a singer in a heavy metal band. Being now that she is approaching her 50th birthday she is thinking of discarding her dreadlocks and giving up stagediving and throaty screams. I think the musical scene in Germany will suffer for her absence.

Renaeden? Well like a venus fly trap this lady will happily wait for her next victim. Then she devours slowly but unlike the fly trap she will laugh all the while. She is a nasty piece of work.

Zegh is our resident health nut. He is a firm believer of thy body is a temple. He is a hard bastard. He is a marathon runner and a martial artist too. Has like 8 abs.

TA is a ballroom champion. He honed his athletic ability in college as his school football teams mascot. He posts here between dance contests and has plenty of moves both on and off the dancefloor to share

Parts is a moderator. Parts gives the impression of a startled deer in the headlights with how he posts. The position of mod is a constant state of stress for him. I blame this in part to his real life job as an Abbott. He is very devout and in this shares his love of the church with Calavera. He prays for us nightly.

IceQueen is A figure skater training currently in Canada. He is from a well to do and connected french Canadian family. The Ice part of his username is suggestive of his profession but no idea what the Queen part signifies?

Bodie is our most prestigious member. She can trace her Italian heritage back to Julius Caesar. She is a gentle and studious historian working for the National Library of Rome and any conversations about Roman and its incursions against the filthy degenerates that would defy Rome is strongly welcomed.

PMSElle? PMSelle is a fervent believer of anarchy and the dissolution of the state. In between Satan worship and undermining the government and learning the necessary skills to demobile and destroy the government infrastructure, she works as a florist. Quiet a talented flower arranger.
 
Earthboundmisfit is Muslim Fundamentalist. He is a nice guy. Don't mention anything about terrorism or infidels or anything of that nature. The rant you will experience is rather scary. We believe he is a terrorist and that is ok. So long as he does not seek to hurt the site let's steer off these subject. I think I have said too much.

PikaJedi is a weight lifter and body builder. Prize money from competitions has afforded him a gym in France where he lives and trains. He is a metaphorically as soft as brie when it comes to arguing and contesting a position. He is a soft touch.

Badger Tom is a Army Major for the Chilean Army. He is an Attache attached to the Embassy of Chile in the US. He is a master of communications. He is a Graduate of English Literature. He is fluent in 5 languages. His second favourite Author is Charles Dickens and his favourite is De Seuss.

Duck Fetish girl is a Diesel Mechanic and has a profession boxing record that is looking to replace her need to work. She will take out most blokes. In fact if you are reading this, yeah that means she will probably quite easily punch you the fuck out too. Aside from that, she is delightful, unless you are a duck.....but that is a whole other story.

Professor Farnsworth? I think beneath his friendly exterior could well be a latent psychopath. In fact there is little I believe to stop him going postal. In time he will and all that will save us all from saying "I knew that guy. I always suspected he would" will be the fact that his username is not his real name. I think this is better in a way don't you?

Zippo is the oldest member of the forum. He spend a little time here but is in training for the inter-retirement village ping pong championships. He was inspired to take up ping pong many years ago after being stationed in Asia. He researched ping pong from some Asian ladies of dubious repute and now has a killer serve. All in experienced muscle control.

Peter is the only member we have from Africa. He is by birth a Pygmy and until recently had no inclination what the internet was but has come leaps and bounds in a very short time. He has wonderful stories to tell you of the open plains of Africa and his triumphs against wild beasts whilst protecting his homeland

Have you met Pyraxis?
You will like her. I wrote a special poem for her.

"She is fun and always in good cheer

She will happily rip you from arsehole to ear"

Do you like it?

I guess you will get to know the rest.

Oh of course there is me. I am I admit VERY sensitive and easily hurt. l am the meet and greeter and will steer you well in this little forum to make your life as easy as possible.

Oh as far as calling out I would expect you may wish to find a reason to "callout" to Odeon, Cassanova Frankenstein, El presidente and Skyblue in that approximate order.

Anyhow i better just leave you with it, and step away......and walk away quietly.
« Last Edit: June 01, 2013, 10:41:04 AM by Al Swearengen »
I2 today is not i2 of yesteryear. It is a knitting circle. Those that participate be they nice or asshats know their place and the price to be there. Odeon is the overlord

.Benevolent if you toe the line.

Think it is I2 of old? Even Odeon is not so delusional as to think otherwise. He may on occasionally pretend otherwise but his base is that knitting circle.

Censoring/banning/restricting/moderating myself, Calanadale & Scrapheap were all not his finest moments.

How to apologise to Scrap

Offline El-Presidente

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Re: Intensity Guide for Newbies: take two
« Reply #1 on: June 01, 2013, 08:12:25 AM »
Peace be upon you Mr Al for your kind words.

Offline Queen Victoria

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Re: Intensity Guide for Newbies: take two
« Reply #2 on: June 01, 2013, 08:29:53 AM »
take two?  Does that mean the newbie gets his/her choice of two of us?   :zombiefuck:
A good monarch is a treasure. A good politician is an oxymoron.

My brain is both uninhibited and uninhabited.

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Offline Al Swearegen

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Re: Intensity Guide for Newbies: take two
« Reply #3 on: June 01, 2013, 08:33:39 AM »
take two?  Does that mean the newbie gets his/her choice of two of us?   :zombiefuck:

Nah getting rid of the last one. (mainly due to Brucie's comments)
I2 today is not i2 of yesteryear. It is a knitting circle. Those that participate be they nice or asshats know their place and the price to be there. Odeon is the overlord

.Benevolent if you toe the line.

Think it is I2 of old? Even Odeon is not so delusional as to think otherwise. He may on occasionally pretend otherwise but his base is that knitting circle.

Censoring/banning/restricting/moderating myself, Calanadale & Scrapheap were all not his finest moments.

How to apologise to Scrap

Offline odeon

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Re: Intensity Guide for Newbies: take two
« Reply #4 on: June 01, 2013, 10:36:01 AM »
The word filter did its magic. :zoinks:
"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."

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Offline 'andersom'

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Re: Intensity Guide for Newbies: take two
« Reply #5 on: June 01, 2013, 11:14:19 AM »
I owe you a plus for this revised version. But, have to wait for about 30 minutes.
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Offline Al Swearegen

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Re: Intensity Guide for Newbies: take two
« Reply #6 on: June 01, 2013, 11:28:42 AM »
I owe you a plus for this revised version. But, have to wait for about 30 minutes.

Thanks
I2 today is not i2 of yesteryear. It is a knitting circle. Those that participate be they nice or asshats know their place and the price to be there. Odeon is the overlord

.Benevolent if you toe the line.

Think it is I2 of old? Even Odeon is not so delusional as to think otherwise. He may on occasionally pretend otherwise but his base is that knitting circle.

Censoring/banning/restricting/moderating myself, Calanadale & Scrapheap were all not his finest moments.

How to apologise to Scrap

Offline MLA

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Re: Intensity Guide for Newbies: take two
« Reply #7 on: June 01, 2013, 06:33:28 PM »
Nice!  So where will you steer me next?

Offline BadgerTom

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Re: Intensity Guide for Newbies: take two
« Reply #8 on: June 01, 2013, 06:51:46 PM »
Badger Tom is a Army Major for the Chilean Army. He is an Attache attached to the Embassy of Chile in the US. He is a master of communications. He is a Graduate of English Literature. He is fluent in 5 languages. His second favourite Author is Charles Dickens and his favourite is De Seuss.

Your words move me sir, and the people's republic of Chile!

Well, only four, Bad english is still English!

Do you like Green eggs and Ham!? Do you like them, Sam I Am :)

Offline Jesse

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Re: Intensity Guide for Newbies: take two
« Reply #9 on: June 01, 2013, 06:53:39 PM »
I'll do my best of you. I hope it fits, if it doesn't Oh well.

Al Swearington is what we call a man with issues. Don't know what his life is like? Just turn on some jerry springer. baby momma drama 24/7. thinks he is important but really isn't, short. I mean danny davito length, I've seen bigger cats then him which would explain his enormous ego. overcompensating for his small size. super round fat belly with skinny arms legs

:skywarp:

Offline MLA

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Re: Intensity Guide for Newbies: take two
« Reply #10 on: June 01, 2013, 06:56:30 PM »
Hi again Niles

Offline Jesse

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Re: Intensity Guide for Newbies: take two
« Reply #11 on: June 01, 2013, 06:59:01 PM »
Hello, you should post a picture. boobs, face, butt. anything. I'll take anything, :laugh:
:skywarp:

Offline BadgerTom

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Re: Intensity Guide for Newbies: take two
« Reply #12 on: June 01, 2013, 07:08:46 PM »
I'll do my best of you. I hope it fits, if it doesn't Oh well.

Al Swearington is what we call a man with issues. Don't know what his life is like? Just turn on some jerry springer. baby momma drama 24/7. thinks he is important but really isn't, short. I mean danny davito length, I've seen bigger cats then him which would explain his enormous ego. overcompensating for his small size. super round fat belly with skinny arms legs



Al, maybe you should also mention his issues with sarcasm!

You will have to make due with my avatar for now.  It's actually a good likeness.

So you have grey skin and pink hair!

Have you ever used Krokodil!?

Offline BadgerTom

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Offline Jesse

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Re: Intensity Guide for Newbies: take two
« Reply #14 on: June 01, 2013, 07:12:05 PM »
You will have to make due with my avatar for now.  It's actually a good likeness.
Nice. love the possum boobies, so hot.
:skywarp: