Well I guess going to the gym is pretty important to me. I used to think I would get suicidal if I got overweight, yet here I am 30kgs heavier and I am dealing with it. I am not happy, of course, but it isn't earth shatteringly bad. I am just trying to stay active. I think my antidepressants have a hand in not letting this become too much for me to handle.
Yeah, same here... I have an immense fear of losing control of my weight. I am certainly heavier than I have been in a long time, and hope to get back on track. I have issues with binge eating and bulimia so that is why. I am not overweight, however, just a higher BMI than I am comfortable with. I was 130Ibs at 5'10 last year and am now more like 145.
I can definitely understand the fear of losing control. I have never had an eating disorder but do fear my weight getting any higher than it is. I weighed 55kgs since I was 17 and ate what I wanted. Which probably wasn't much. But then I had my medication changed and the weight piled on, 30kgs in a year. I looked in the mirror one day and came to the conclusion that I was fat. I had to buy new clothes that fit me. New bras too.
Last year I started going to the gym, then I changed gyms to one that is closer to me. I do a weights class and cardio in my own time. My BMI shows that I am obese!
I was on a site called myfitnesspal for several years, where you can log your food daily, and it works it all out for you. Lot of very useful info on the forums there too. They are very into the balanced approach where you don't go to extremes. My best results came from a combination of cycling, boxing fitness and weights. I also did running sometimes and circuits. I really did have it as a special interest, I believe, as I read loads about nutrition and fitness during those years and my bodyfat was down at 12% which is very low for a female.
I also kept to a diet of basically fish, chicken, sweet potatoes, fruits, nuts, vegetables, eggs, dark chocolate, cottage cheese, Greek yoghurt and such things. But it was quite hard to sustain that level of activity. I was doing about 90 minutes, 5 times a week at least.
I am sure you can get the weight off if you want to.