I just hope my main allocated GP doesn't retire any time soon. He is fairly old, don't know how old, but certainly getting on in years. He's the doc that actually owns the practice and he is definitely the most popular doc there. Unlike the rest, he's always been kindly, and has a great bedside manner. Not only that, but importantly he isn't biased against giving patients in need meds a lot of younger doctors just automatically refuse, the kind that wait until somebody is roadkill or terminal before they give out so much as a crappy dose of codeine. He's the one that finally, after spending my childhood with nothing at all for pain management, at first tried me with codeine then dihydrocodeine, and then when they acted for too short a time, the codeine not being strong enough and subject to a metabolic rate-limit in dose of a half gram, beyond which it just cannot be utilized and is simply broken down and excreted, every 6 hours or so, and the DHC sort of is but not wholly, lasted way too short, and still didn't properly cut it, so he moved me on to oxycontin 80s, which here people were shocked to find I'd been given without having cancer, a broken back, been stabbed/shot/suffered 2nd degree burns to most of my body or had my eyes ripped out of my head. And unlike every other doctor in the building was willing to give me the chlormethiazole I take as an antiseizure drug. The rest of them refused me anything for it outright. It could be abused, yes, and occasionally I'll make some myself (its quite easy, starting from vitamin B1, can be done in just two steps, not including the purification and extractions) for that purpose, or if I've had a seizure and needed an extra dose to stop it in its tracks before it gets to a serious degree, to kill it before it gets going, then I can replace it, and sometimes he will. The rest of them just refused me anything at all, abusable or completely without abuse potential whatsoever. And he's let me have some benzos on a repeat script until I don't need them, due to anxiety owing to the pig case against me (now been dropped without charge for total lack of evidence, because there wasn't any evidence to begin with, as I wasn't DOING what I was accused of (they keep trying, making the same false accusation, knowing full well its false, to get a warrant to come and harass me and my family)
Any other doc there? good luck trying to get those, unless you have a seizure in the office and they hit you with IM valium on the spot). He knows damned well that I know the dependency potential, and know enough about medicine and physiology to know what I am doing with them and not to get physically dependent upon the stuff. What he gave me, he originally was going to give me diazepam/valium IIRC, which I don't much care for, and don't find very effective, so agreed when I asked to give me nitrazepam, a very long lasting, and highly potent sedative-hypnotic benzo that lasts all day, and even agreed to let me increase my max dose to give me enough for twice a day, 14 a week, doubtless knowing I won't take it daily for addiction/dependence liability reasons, and will, when I need it, use as much as needed, when I have to (I.e use more than 2 daily, but only for a couple of days in a row at most). Case is dropped, but given the difficulty of obtaining them, I'm now building a stockpile, that I'll keep on the shelves, for those occasional days of the kind you just want to crawl into bed, pull the quilt over your head and leave nothing but your middle finger visible, directed at the rest of the world at large needing the day to go away, feeling stressed, overloaded and frazzled, like your nervous system was put through a blender full of acid.
