Help Richard: Let's post the food we like eating. Here. :)

[Minister Of Silly Walks]

My Dad worked as a chef on a cruise liner before he married and settled down. He told us horror stories about what went on behind the scenes ( like when the Captain pissed off another chef, so he got his revenge by wiping  his dick with the Captain's steak). Dad wouldn't eat out at all, not at home nor abroad,  if he could possibly avoid it.

The first cruise I ever went on was when I was 13 years old. I was 6'2" or 6'3" in bare feet by that stage and I got a dreadful tummy bug (that ship was notorious for it). I lost a pile of weight, I was under 10 stone (140 pounds, or about 63 kilos) and rake thin by the time the cruise ended.

The second and last cruise I ever went on was better, no gastro outbreaks that I was aware of.

[Walkie]

^that definitely wasn't my Dad's fault..but its entirely possible that some of his crewmates were still floating around. I can't for the life of me recall the name of his ship , if I ever knew it. But I do recall him saying  that a popular novelist, name of Richard Gordon, took a cruise aboard, and  later wrote a book called "the Captain's Table"  which was totally based on that ship and chockfull of characters that were instantly recognisable to the crew.

Here's the very book:

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/6705044-the-captain-s-table

I've been meaning to read it sometime,  but never have.  I suppose  my enthusiasm was dulled somewhat by Dad's asurance that he didn't feature in that cast of characters.

[Minister Of Silly Walks]

^that definitely wasn't my Dad's fault..but its entirely possible that some of his crewmates were still floating around. I can't for the life of me recall the name of his ship , if I ever knew it.

It was the Fairstar. A lot of the crew were Italian. I remember the bread rolls had "bits" stuck to them sometimes, butter or food or whatever. Turns out that the bread rolls stayed on the table until someone ate them, often through several sittings, and they weren't checked for "bits".

[renaeden]

My mum is a really good cook and I wish she taught me how. But while I was growing up I was only allowed in the kitchen to do the dishes and prepare breakfast (cereal or toast). Somehow my sisters taught themselves (my twin makes tasty stuff) but I've pretty much remained clueless. When I lived on my own I ate mainly frozen meals cooked in the microwave but I did teach myself how to make beef goulash. That's a memory that stands out, I don't know why. Now, Kayleigh cooks.

[Minister Of Silly Walks]

My mother was an excellent cook.

I'm not bad. I can cook just about anything you can find in a cookbook.

[Walkie]

After I got married, my husband, Rob,  taught me the basics, like cooking chips, and i taught myself  all sorts of other stuff like sauces, quiches and  pizzas out of an encyclopaedic set of cookery magazines that I subscribed to  (It was remarkablly good, having photographic images for every little  step and extremely clear and detailed instructions which- incredibly-  included all the stuff that most ""How to" guides leave out, on the assumption that everybody knows that already. I never do)  Thanks to Mum (I suppose) I had to force myself against a deep-seated fear of fire all the time, and was a  bag of nerves when frying, or when grilling fatty things, like bacon.    That had always looked dangerous to me. I'd watch other people grilling bacon. see the fat dripping and spitting and wonder how the heck they stopped it bursting into flames? i eventually told myself, don't be silly, that just doesn't happen, so there's  no reason why it should happen to me,  Guess what? the very first time I overcame my terror and  tried grilling bacon , the freaking grill pan burst into flames, didn't it? I was so shocked, my mind went bank, and I couldn't for the life of me  think what you're supposed to do about that? But i had to do something didn't I? So.... I took a very deep breath and just blew the flames out, like the candles on a birthday cake. Really!  .  Then felt equally stunned (but deeply relieved)  that it actually worked.

[Walkie]

My mum is a really good cook and I wish she taught me how. But while I was growing up I was only allowed in the kitchen to do the dishes and prepare breakfast (cereal or toast). Somehow my sisters taught themselves (my twin makes tasty stuff) but I've pretty much remained clueless. When I lived on my own I ate mainly frozen meals cooked in the microwave but I did teach myself how to make beef goulash. That's a memory that stands out, I don't know why. Now, Kayleigh cooks.

your Mum wasn't just like mine, was she?
in any case.

I recall that Rob was the envy of his workmates for a couple of years, because his luchbox would be brimful of delicious home-made  treats, whereas they had to make do with sandwiches. Then I got bored with the "housewife" kick, ofc , and went back to school (and turned veggie, though i continued to cook meat for Rob. Seemed only fair. But he mostly had to make do with ready-made quiches from Sainsbury's cos I didn't have time for making my own any more).  And then we spilt up (for unrelated reasons). But those cookery skills pretty much set me up for life. And we stayed friends for life (he died, prematurely, of a heart condition  about three years ago)

Still,  in spite of my success with teaching myself, i don't recall ever persuading Mum to eat anything i'd cooked . If it wasn't too exotic (and my Mum  considered a leek or bell pepper ""ëxotic" FFS) or too fancy, it just wasn't "what she fancied" right now.  When she stayed with me, she complained to my sister that I spent ages and ages  in the kictchen making unnecessaily fancy meals.  The fact was that I did  take ages in the kitchen, but not for the reason stated. It was  partly  because I'm slow and clumsy, always have been, so cooking (and cleaning up after myself) always takes me much longer than for most  people; and partly because (by that time) my food sensitivities meant that i just had to make almost everything from scratch. Often, I was making the direct equivalent  of various foods  that she would happily eat, if only they were picked up from the chilled counter at Sainsbury's and warmed up in the microwave. I tried really, really  hard to  cater to her tastes,  to no avail whatsoever,  not ever. 

[Jack]

Don't cook anymore because of not needing to do it. Never enjoyed cooking, which resulted in a mediocre cook who simply makes edible food. Completely missing the ingredient of love.

[Jesse]

I do light cooking. *weeble noises* 

Mostly however, I will stick to the western style of preparing food.

I wouldn't last in a 3rd world country.