Fighting over something that's supposed to be trivial at the end of the day

[Calavera]

A lot of the times, I see myself to be quite sane and rational and fair when dealing with people in real life, but sometimes I just f*ck it up and end up randomly having a fight with a slightly "unempathetic" NT over something that may seem so silly and trivial to the NT but serious to me.

I don't know why it's serious for me exactly, but it just happens to be, whatever the reason may be.

For example, at work, 3 weeks ago, I ended up wrestling my coworker (and ripping his shirt off in the process) because I refused for him to mop the floor of the back room of the computer shop when I was around and suggested he do it another time. For me, as the floor wasn't sticky and no customers come into the back room anyway, I didn't see much point behind the urgency of the mopping. But nevertheless, my refusal to have him mop at the time got him pissed off he slapped me across the face and then that's when I retaliated and eventually left the shop that day to him alone.

The floor had been somewhat dirty for quite some time, though. So I can see now after some clarity of mind after the event why he would want to have it mopped right when he could.

But just shows how silly some situations can get just because of seemingly innocent differences in mentality.

Does anyone relate to what I'm trying to say here?

["couldbecousin"]

   I can certainly relate to the inflexibility and territoriality that can crop up in a workplace
   when two people are determined to do something in the same space at the same time and
   neither will back down.  I must say, though, I've never seen it get physical to the degree
   that you describe.  Maybe that's an Aussie thing.   

[P7PSP]

Yes but it has been a while since anything like that has happened so I can't remember any specifics.

["couldbecousin"]

Yes but it has been a while since anything like that has happened so I can't remember any specifics.

  Pleading the Fifth, eh?  Very clever. 

[Callaway]

A lot of the times, I see myself to be quite sane and rational and fair when dealing with people in real life, but sometimes I just f*ck it up and end up randomly having a fight with a slightly "unempathetic" NT over something that may seem so silly and trivial to the NT but serious to me.

I don't know why it's serious for me exactly, but it just happens to be, whatever the reason may be.

For example, at work, 3 weeks ago, I ended up wrestling my coworker (and ripping his shirt off in the process) because I refused for him to mop the floor of the back room of the computer shop when I was around and suggested he do it another time. For me, as the floor wasn't sticky and no customers come into the back room anyway, I didn't see much point behind the urgency of the mopping. But nevertheless, my refusal to have him mop at the time got him pissed off he slapped me across the face and then that's when I retaliated and eventually left the shop that day to him alone.

The floor had been somewhat dirty for quite some time, though. So I can see now after some clarity of mind after the event why he would want to have it mopped right when he could.

But just shows how silly some situations can get just because of seemingly innocent differences in mentality.

Does anyone relate to what I'm trying to say here?

I do.

Several years ago, I bought my parents a large Oriental rug for their living room for Christmas and I wanted to clean the floor before I rolled it out because of course I didn't want to get their brand new rug dirty.  My mom was very excited about the new rug and wanted me to do this immediately as well because she couldn't wait to see their new rug on the floor; however, my dad was equally adamant that I not clean the floor at that time.  I thought my dad was being completely unreasonable and I didn't want to disappoint my mom so I started to clean the floor anyway and he had a freak-out fit.  In hindsight, I should have been more sensitive to my dad's inability to deal with even relatively minor changes and perhaps I should have just waited until he was out of the house to clean their floor and put down their new rug.

[Calavera]

So your father is on the spectrum?

Anyway, after a bit of reading today and some introspection, it looks like I really do despise change of routine after all. I didn't realize this until today.

[renaeden]

What did you read?

Once I was picked up at the airport after a trip away by my parents only to find they had gotten a different car and a whole lot of new furniture. Parts of the house had completely changed. It was too much for me to take in at first so I hid in my room. Later I thought I was an idiot for not being able to handle such things but I guess it is part of being on the spectrum.

[Calavera]

http://www.autism-help.org/adults-aspergers-anger.htm

Having routines and order disrupted

That was definitely me. I was enjoying concentrating on the task at hand when that happened.

[P7PSP]

http://www.heretical.com/miscella/reptile.html

[The Member Formerly Known As Sophist]

Seriously? The guy attacked you because you didn't want the floor mopped?

I would've had him arrested. 

[Parts]

I have these problems at times but they have not lead to a physical altercation in a very very long time.

[Callaway]

So your father is on the spectrum?

Anyway, after a bit of reading today and some introspection, it looks like I really do despise change of routine after all. I didn't realize this until today.

My dad is dead and he wasn't ever diagnosed, but I think he was.

[Calavera]

Seriously? The guy attacked you because you didn't want the floor mopped?

I would've had him arrested. 

That's not rational. Good people make mistakes, too. Besides, he didn't do it instantly. I was being too stubborn, and he eventually snapped.

He apologized, and I did, too. So no problem.

[bodie]

Some men just dislike being overtaken by a woman and then hoof the gas to make it harder to overtake  -  have thrown a 16" pizza on their windscreen for that!  Perfectly reasonable

Anyway Calavera, thanks for the info i would slap your face on purpose if i thought you were going to rip the shirt off my back

[Calavera]

Why haven't you done just that?