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Start here => What's your crime? Basic Discussion => Topic started by: Jesse on June 08, 2013, 08:03:45 PM

Title: guess what?
Post by: Jesse on June 08, 2013, 08:03:45 PM
I have set up an appointment for a handjob tonite from a regular. It doesn't suck because I know this person and, they have a big ass TV I can watch while the action is being performed.

I know, I know. my life fucking rules
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: "couldbecousin" on June 08, 2013, 08:18:57 PM
  All the threads on the board and I had to open this one.   :GA:
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: skyblue1 on June 08, 2013, 08:22:03 PM
I have set up an appointment for a handjob tonite from a regular. It doesn't suck because I know this person and, they have a big ass TV I can watch while the action is being performed.

I know, I know. my life fucking rules
whats wrong with your hand?

I had both of mine operated on in the 90's

There was no TV where I had my surgery

Hope your hand gets better soon

I will pray for your swift recovery
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: Queen Victoria on June 08, 2013, 08:41:58 PM
richard, I'm replying without even looking at this thread because I never know what you'll come up with.   :include:
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: "couldbecousin" on June 08, 2013, 08:45:32 PM
richard, I'm replying without even looking at this thread because I never know what you'll come up with.   :include:

  Tis wise to avert your eyes, Your Majesty!  :cbc:  *wobbles in with the Royal Eyeshade*
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: Queen Victoria on June 08, 2013, 08:47:56 PM
richard, I'm replying without even looking at this thread because I never know what you'll come up with.   :include:

  Tis wise to avert your eyes, Your Majesty!  :cbc:  *wobbles in with the Royal Eyeshade*

Should we ask that a scientific study be made of this astounding "what'?  (Poor richard, I'm so glad he can take teasing so well.)
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: "couldbecousin" on June 08, 2013, 09:00:51 PM
richard, I'm replying without even looking at this thread because I never know what you'll come up with.   :include:

  Tis wise to avert your eyes, Your Majesty!  :cbc:  *wobbles in with the Royal Eyeshade*

Should we ask that a scientific study be made of this astounding "what'?  (Poor richard, I'm so glad he can take teasing so well.)

  A scientific study might lead to ... photographs.  :twitch:
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: Queen Victoria on June 08, 2013, 09:01:57 PM
richard, I'm replying without even looking at this thread because I never know what you'll come up with.   :include:

  Tis wise to avert your eyes, Your Majesty!  :cbc:  *wobbles in with the Royal Eyeshade*

Should we ask that a scientific study be made of this astounding "what'?  (Poor richard, I'm so glad he can take teasing so well.)

  A scientific study might lead to ... photographs.  :twitch:

and measurements? 
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: "couldbecousin" on June 08, 2013, 09:07:43 PM
richard, I'm replying without even looking at this thread because I never know what you'll come up with.   :include:

  Tis wise to avert your eyes, Your Majesty!  :cbc:  *wobbles in with the Royal Eyeshade*

Should we ask that a scientific study be made of this astounding "what'?  (Poor richard, I'm so glad he can take teasing so well.)

  A scientific study might lead to ... photographs.  :twitch:

and measurements?

      Noooooooooo!    :runaway:
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: Queen Victoria on June 08, 2013, 09:10:28 PM
richard, I'm replying without even looking at this thread because I never know what you'll come up with.   :include:

  Tis wise to avert your eyes, Your Majesty!  :cbc:  *wobbles in with the Royal Eyeshade*

Should we ask that a scientific study be made of this astounding "what'?  (Poor richard, I'm so glad he can take teasing so well.)

  A scientific study might lead to ... photographs.  :twitch:

and measurements?

      Noooooooooo!    :runaway:

Oh, so this "what" is something that deflates rather quickly?
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: skyblue1 on June 08, 2013, 09:10:49 PM
richard, I'm replying without even looking at this thread because I never know what you'll come up with.   :include:

  Tis wise to avert your eyes, Your Majesty!  :cbc:  *wobbles in with the Royal Eyeshade*

Should we ask that a scientific study be made of this astounding "what'?  (Poor richard, I'm so glad he can take teasing so well.)

  A scientific study might lead to ... photographs.  :twitch:

and measurements?

      Noooooooooo!    :runaway:
^thats funny
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: Genesis on June 09, 2013, 12:00:09 AM
 :flyingbat:  :include:
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: 'andersom' on June 09, 2013, 04:50:34 AM
  All the threads on the board and I had to open this one.   :GA:

Even Richard is averting his eyes, thank goodness for him, there is a huge TV screen.
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: Jesse on June 09, 2013, 08:44:11 AM
Everyone made the topic what it wanted to become. way to go, I knew there was a reason why I keep coming back here.  :laugh:
Its not the best situation in the world mind you. but this person is safe, clean and has cable. I couldn't say no

I only really do it as a last resort when I start talking to my bowl of fruit that I have sitting on the table here about sex.

I become delirious after months of not getting any.
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: El-Presidente on June 09, 2013, 09:15:38 AM
I have set up an appointment for a handjob tonite from a regular. It doesn't suck because I know this person and, they have a big ass TV I can watch while the action is being performed.

I know, I know. my life fucking rules

So tell me more. Who is wanking you off? Do they use lube? Do you get any mouth action? Does he she get naked or do you get to watch porno? Is your Dick big enough that they can go for the old two handed wank?
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: Jesse on June 09, 2013, 11:27:29 AM
 :santa: was jacking this guy off:  :seal:

I hate Oral sex. mostely because very few people actually know how to fucking do it correctly. we did it to computer porn, all of wich lasted around 40 minutes just shy of an hour. I wore very cute clothes, and one ring. Of course my dick is big enough for a two handed grabber. it was so much cock infact, I don't think he knew what to do with it. ever see a 13 foot eal? I came on my tummy and he played with it.

 after of which I walked home. drank a glass of water and fell asleep

Successful day. I imagine
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: "couldbecousin" on June 09, 2013, 01:58:04 PM
Everyone made the topic what it wanted to become. way to go, I knew there was a reason why I keep coming back here.  :laugh:
Its not the best situation in the world mind you. but this person is safe, clean and has cable. I couldn't say no

I only really do it as a last resort when I start talking to my bowl of fruit that I have sitting on the table here about sex.

I become delirious after months of not getting any.


  You'll know you're delirious when you see the fruit getting more action than you do!    :bananas:
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: El-Presidente on June 09, 2013, 02:04:35 PM
:santa: was jacking this guy off:  :seal:

I hate Oral sex. mostely because very few people actually know how to fucking do it correctly. we did it to computer porn, all of wich lasted around 40 minutes just shy of an hour. I wore very cute clothes, and one ring. Of course my dick is big enough for a two handed grabber. it was so much cock infact, I don't think he knew what to do with it. ever see a 13 foot eal? I came on my tummy and he played with it.

 after of which I walked home. drank a glass of water and fell asleep

Successful day. I imagine

LOL
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: Jesse on June 09, 2013, 04:43:53 PM
So good I'm going back for seconds tonite. exept this time I'm getting spanked,  :evillaugh:
And. I think there will be pot, not that I'll smoke any because I don't really like it but I might take a puff or two
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: "couldbecousin" on June 09, 2013, 04:46:44 PM
So good I'm going back for seconds tonite. exept this time I'm getting spanked,  :evillaugh:
And. I think there will be pot, not that I'll smoke any because I don't really like it but I might take a puff or two

  Now don't go all Bill Clinton on us, taking a puff   :stoned: is smoking it, even if you don't inhale!
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: Jesse on June 09, 2013, 04:49:07 PM
Yeah. I don't know if I will, just a thought. I can't hold my drugs down anymore, 'tis so sad
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: "couldbecousin" on June 09, 2013, 04:51:20 PM
Yeah. I don't know if I will, just a thought. I can't hold my drugs down anymore, 'tis so sad

  It's just as well, you're better off without them.  Keep your head clear!  :viking:
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: Jesse on June 09, 2013, 04:56:39 PM
I probably wont. the last time I smoked pot it was disasterous, panic attacks from hell. the entire high, leading to some god awful paranioa words do not describe that awful hell I was in. I actually cried I was so scared and I don't ever cry, exept the last time I was hungover. and decided to get alcohol free, I cried that day. and went to the hospital because I was in so much pain. goddamn

Drugs=bad. I do pity the fool, but occasionally I get jelouse if someone can seemingly do them without any consequences.
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: "couldbecousin" on June 09, 2013, 05:05:55 PM
I probably wont. the last time I smoked pot it was disasterous, panic attacks from hell. the entire high, leading to some god awful paranioa words do not describe that awful hell I was in. I actually cried I was so scared and I don't ever cry, exept the last time I was hungover. and decided to get alcohol free, I cried that day. and went to the hospital because I was in so much pain. goddamn

Drugs=bad. I do pity the fool, but occasionally I get jelouse if someone can seemingly do them without any consequences.

  But if you could do drugs without immediate consequences, you might end up as a total burnout.    :baked:
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: Jesse on June 09, 2013, 05:12:56 PM
your right. I see these chickhens walking around out here with backpacks on (I live next to a alley) that look tore up from the floor up. filth, mental illness, and addiction. And it makes me really happy with the choices I have made because I was def. headed down that path
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: "couldbecousin" on June 09, 2013, 05:19:29 PM
your right. I see these chickhens walking around out here with backpacks on (I live next to a alley) that look tore up from the floor up. filth, mental illness, and addiction. And it makes me really happy with the choices I have made because I was def. headed down that path

  Now you can see the road ahead and make long-range plans.  8)
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: Jesse on June 09, 2013, 09:32:49 PM
My long term plans include spanking hot girls and guys. It is my new favorite thing to do, thank the lord he gave me a nice butt.
Not only was it ment for poor suckers online to follow, it almost needs a good spanking on Tuesdays and Thursdays
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: Al Swearegen on June 10, 2013, 01:21:21 AM
Good to see you are in a nice commuted relationship with someone you love. You have every right to laud your success
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: El on June 10, 2013, 05:30:46 AM
:santa: was jacking this guy off:  :seal:

I hate Oral sex. mostely because very few people actually know how to fucking do it correctly. we did it to computer porn, all of wich lasted around 40 minutes just shy of an hour. I wore very cute clothes, and one ring. Of course my dick is big enough for a two handed grabber. it was so much cock infact, I don't think he knew what to do with it. ever see a 13 foot eal? I came on my tummy and he played with it.

 after of which I walked home. drank a glass of water and fell asleep

Successful day. I imagine
...never knew blowjobs required so much knowledge and skill.  :toporly:
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: McGiver on June 10, 2013, 07:34:39 AM
:santa: was jacking this guy off:  :seal:

I hate Oral sex. mostely because very few people actually know how to fucking do it correctly. we did it to computer porn, all of wich lasted around 40 minutes just shy of an hour. I wore very cute clothes, and one ring. Of course my dick is big enough for a two handed grabber. it was so much cock infact, I don't think he knew what to do with it. ever see a 13 foot eal? I came on my tummy and he played with it.

 after of which I walked home. drank a glass of water and fell asleep

Successful day. I imagine
...never knew blowjobs required so much knowledge and skill.  :toporly:
just watch the teeth and keep working.  Right?
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: Jesse on June 10, 2013, 09:44:35 AM
PMS Elle I have no doubt your Oral skills are marvelous. Most people don't know how to suck a dick or lick a pussy however

never ever use your hands sucking cock. or teeth, and go down on the whole thing. not just the first two inches
I don't have a pussy but most women I have talked to online like the entire thing to be licked, not just the clit. and fingered at the same time. when your fucking her pussy you should also play with her asshole with your finger

these are good rules to live by
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: El-Presidente on June 10, 2013, 10:00:23 AM
Nile my boy have you ever considered doing porno?
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: McGiver on June 10, 2013, 10:25:30 AM
Nile my boy have you ever considered doing porno?
seconded.
But first post a picture of your orgasm face.
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: Jesse on June 10, 2013, 04:40:36 PM
I have some porn videos if you would like to see them, hur. hur.  :zoinks:

I do amature porn by myself.  :laugh:
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: El-Presidente on June 11, 2013, 02:15:30 PM
I have some porn videos if you would like to see them, hur. hur.  :zoinks:

I do amature porn by myself.  :laugh:

 :orly:
Title: Re: guess what?
Post by: Jesse on June 11, 2013, 03:20:25 PM
 >:D