INTENSITY²
Politics, Mature and taboo => Political Pundits => Topic started by: Adam on November 02, 2010, 10:25:34 AM
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Apart from the risk of dodgy sites fucking up your computer, would you stop your 15yr old son (for example) looking at porn?
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How could you stop them? Now it's so easy but it was easy when I was young too before the web. Stop the no but I would not encourage it
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KNOCK IT OFF WITH THE FUCKING SPAM TOPICS SOPH!!!
:finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger:
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I wouldn't have a problem with it as long as they wern't looking at stuff that I thought was gross, like bestiality, necrophilia, and the like.
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KNOCK IT OFF WITH THE FUCKING SPAM TOPICS SOPH!!!
:finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger: :finger:
At least they are valid topics and she is responding to them
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At least they are valid topics and she is responding to them
Yeah, that's about all you can say. She's going a little spamtard on us though. :-\
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I don't know whether it is "wrong" socially, but morally, maybe.
As a parent, my fundamental job is to keep my son safe, and that means regulating or introducing materials to him when he is age-ready. And the physical age of a person does not always reflect their emotional or psychological age, so I have to be careful that I do not deprive him or introduce him to things too quickly.
I cannot control what he does with his friends and I am sure he has looked at more than his fair share of stuff, but when it comes to the home that is as much control as I have.
Yep, I have access to all my sons passwords for Facebook, Hotmail and so on. Until he displays a good and mature knowledge of the technology, I got my eye on him. I do not want to censor him, I want to know that he is safe. I know for a fact that he is looking at porn, but the websites are pretty mild as you have to pay to get into the more full on stuff. he does not know that I know.
I would not encourage it, but I cannot deny it either.
Loup
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If you stop them at home, they're going to see it through friends etc. anyway.
I think that there's no problem for teenagers to look at that stuff, since they're at that age were they're curious about sex anyway. It's up to the parents to educate them about sex, not protect them from it. Obviously they're too young to have sex, so they have to be taught that too.
I just don't get why sex is so taboo in today's society. It's a healthy, fun activity if done right.
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Agreed. I don't think it's possible to stop them. I am concerned, though, because the stuff that is easily accessible doesn't really promote sex as a healthy activity. Impressionable young minds and all that.
I fully realise that my daughter will have sex, eventually, but I would prefer that she isn't taken advantage of by some kid who got the wrong idea. I'd have to kill that kid and that's not right either.
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I would accept it, but not encourage it. I would be more concerned if a 15 year old DID NOT show any desire to watch the stuff. :zombiefuck:
I recall many a happy hour when i was a teen sniggering at stuff like that. It is just too embarrassing an issue to discuss with parents. I remember my mum 'having a little chat' and to be honest all i wanted to do was get the fuck away!! Most parents are too late by the time they get round to the topic.
Parents don't really wanna think of their kids having sex. Equally i do not want to think about my mom on all fours either! Which is why i said about accepting it but not encouraging it.
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It's perfectly natural, I would just tell them I do not want to see it and not to fuck up my computer. On the legal end of it: In the States, porn is only 18+ because that is most the prudish Christians could push.
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I think the main thing is that the good aspects of sex ought to be muddled in with harmful aspects of sex.
a healthy respect and like for sex is fine but using it as a way to hurt or control or harm someone or degrade them as a person is wrong and if what they watch represens this then I thing bringing a bit of balance into things is fine.
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Agreed. I don't think it's possible to stop them. I am concerned, though, because the stuff that is easily accessible doesn't really promote sex as a healthy activity. Impressionable young minds and all that.
I fully realise that my daughter will have sex, eventually, but I would prefer that she isn't taken advantage of by some kid who got the wrong idea. I'd have to kill that kid and that's not right either.
There was a woman doing research on knowledge and pleasure in sex, through the last decades, interviewing people from 80, to kids from 15.
Scary outcome is that kids nowadays know a lot about hardcore sex, yet hardly anything about the pleasure of sex.
Best educated, and having most fun, where those who were in their teens in the end of the seventies.
Easy access to hard core porn on the internet made parents and school pay less and less attention on how to educate kids properly on fun and safety.
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It depends on which kind of porn. It's worrying how accessible the most hardcore stuff is to anyone who has the ability to use Google.
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Agreed. I don't think it's possible to stop them. I am concerned, though, because the stuff that is easily accessible doesn't really promote sex as a healthy activity. Impressionable young minds and all that.
I fully realise that my daughter will have sex, eventually, but I would prefer that she isn't taken advantage of by some kid who got the wrong idea. I'd have to kill that kid and that's not right either.
There was a woman doing research on knowledge and pleasure in sex, through the last decades, interviewing people from 80, to kids from 15.
Scary outcome is that kids nowadays know a lot about hardcore sex, yet hardly anything about the pleasure of sex.
Best educated, and having most fun, where those who were in their teens in the end of the seventies.
Easy access to hard core porn on the internet made parents and school pay less and less attention on how to educate kids properly on fun and safety.
:agreed:
My son is only 13 but we've had very frank discussions about sex, what is appropriate what is not. What's okay to watch at his age (no porn, obviously) but if he wants to watch youtube videos of girls in bikinis, then that's fine. One time he came running to whisper in my ear "can the bikinis have strings up the butt?" :facepalm2: I said no because he's kinda young and he's okay with that. We've had lots of talks about respect and how some videos can be degrading to women and the different kinds of sex etc.
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It's perfectly natural, I would just tell them I do not want to see it and not to fuck up my computer. On the legal end of it: In the States, porn is only 18+ because that is most the prudish Christians could push.
I take it you don't have kids.
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The OP didn't state a level of porn. 'Just porn' it says. My previous reply relates directly to the question. My answer did not take into account 'hard core porn' - which is subjective anyway!
I would not condone 'DP Midget's on crucifix's' or anything like that. >:D
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It's a tricky question to answer and trickier still after trying to come up with a more definitive take. I've started writing thoughtful replies only to delete them again soon afterwards.
I think I'll deal with the situation when I have to, if I have to. I'll certainly not attempt that serious discussion with my teenagers unless I'm forced into it, though.
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The thing is, being too prudish about stuff could rub off and a kid could grow up thinking
sex is dirty. That is not good.
I don't think there is anything wrong with some fifteen year olds watching...say..porky's, or looking at titties. Titties are art, afterall.
Gonna be a hypocrite here and say if i had a daughter, i would be much more strict, and would poke my nose in her affairs a bit more. I know, I know...just being honest.
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Exactly. I don't think it would help anything to be too prudish.
I do have a daughter. I'm trying very hard not to be too strict, but I've threatened to lock her in the cellar until she is 30 or so if she goes out in some of her outfits... Didn't help. She asked her mother instead.
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I understand where you are coming from, but you should try and lighten up on the outfits :LOL: The thing is, even if her mum had said no would she eventually start to get changed at her mates? That is what i used to do. It is secretive and not nice.
What if she were out somewhere and got in danger somehow... i dunno, what if she became seperated from her friends and got lost or something...you would want her to call you, wouldn't you? Well if she is out wearing something she shouldn't she is going to hesitate...and you don't want that!
I know it is hard but she is likely only wanting to wear what the other young girls are wearing.
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I understand where you are coming from, but you should try and lighten up on the outfits :LOL: The thing is, even if her mum had said no would she eventually start to get changed at her mates? That is what i used to do. It is secretive and not nice.
What if she were out somewhere and got in danger somehow... i dunno, what if she became seperated from her friends and got lost or something...you would want her to call you, wouldn't you? Well if she is out wearing something she shouldn't she is going to hesitate...and you don't want that!
I know it is hard but she is likely only wanting to wear what the other young girls are wearing.
You're right, of course. I know you are.
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How would anyone propose to stop them? It's like running water now.
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I think that parents like to hope they have full control over little Johnny Snotball and what information goes into his head, but when you have outside influences such as school, and mates
etc then inevitably some of the control is lost.
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I think that parents like to hope they have full control over little Johnny Snotball and what information goes into his head, but when you have outside influences such as school, and mates
etc then inevitably some of the control is lost.
I am trying not to go into this with the expectation of total control, in order to prevent bitter disappointment later :(
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Oh hell, I remember sitting in the closet with friend and a flashlight when I was 13 looking at porn on 8mm film rolls...her dad used to supply the after-hours movie show for the local fire department (her 10yr old brother later got busted trying to peddle the "preview inserts" at school to his friends :LOL:), that was after we got past the lock on the liquor cabinet and replaced the 1/4 bottle of dago red wine we drank with colored water to make it look like it was still almost full.
He's going to look, I'd have to be very naive and stupid to think that he won't.
I just pray every night to the stars that he isn't as rotten or creative as I was. Because if he is, I'm in deep shit.
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It's perfectly natural, I would just tell them I do not want to see it and not to fuck up my computer. On the legal end of it: In the States, porn is only 18+ because that is most the prudish Christians could push.
I take it you don't have kids.
Nope, does that invalidate my opinion?
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But I think as a parent it's okay (and good) to say hey, this is where MY level of comfort is so let's work out some sort of compromise and unless it's something that puts you in danger (then what I say goes) I'm going to let you use your own judgement.
That's the approach I've taken with my kids and so far *fingers crossed* its worked. My kids don't always do the things I like, and that's okay because they're individuals. But it's my responsibility as a parent to help them discover all sides to a topic/situation and then let them have their own experience and practice using their own judgement.
they also know that even if I don't agree, they can come to me with questions and we'll discuss.
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But I think as a parent it's okay (and good) to say hey, this is where MY level of comfort is so let's work out some sort of compromise and unless it's something that puts you in danger (then what I say goes) I'm going to let you use your own judgement.
That's the approach I've taken with my kids and so far *fingers crossed* its worked. My kids don't always do the things I like, and that's okay because they're individuals. But it's my responsibility as a parent to help them discover all sides to a topic/situation and then let them have their own experience and practice using their own judgement.
they also know that even if I don't agree, they can come to me with questions and we'll discuss.
If, as a parent, you can tell your kids that "level of comfort" is important, you teach kids to take their own comfort serious.
The first time kids have sex, should be a safe thing, not only STD and pregnancy wise, also when it comes to kids feeling comfortable with what they do.
The porn kids can see now is different from what was available 25 years ago. That can't be changed. But, it does ask for telling kids that what they think, and what they feel, and what they want, and what scares them or goes way beyond what is comfortable for them is more important than what they find in short clips on the internet.
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I think it is a minefield area!
and shit will happen.. :poo:
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I think it is a minefield area!
and shit will happen.. :poo:
:indeed:
Some kids know all about anal and DP quickies, but have never heard of female orgasm and foreplay......
Shit will happen.
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It's perfectly natural, I would just tell them I do not want to see it and not to fuck up my computer. On the legal end of it: In the States, porn is only 18+ because that is most the prudish Christians could push.
I take it you don't have kids.
Nope, does that invalidate my opinion?
No, the fact shows, that's all.
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I never expected total control, but I'd do my damnedest to protect them. That includes everything in my power.
I don't see most porn as something bad they should be protected against. Sex is, as most seem to agree, healthy and I'd add that it is a necessary prerequisite for grandkids, the survival of the species, etc. But, kids now have access to things we couldn't even imagine when we were their age (and I'm speaking about my approximate age group). They know more and they know it earlier, but the basic reasoning skills are about the same. Some of the stuff that is available is not OK but how are they supposed to know?
That's what worries me.
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Agreed. I don't think it's possible to stop them. I am concerned, though, because the stuff that is easily accessible doesn't really promote sex as a healthy activity. Impressionable young minds and all that.
I fully realise that my daughter will have sex, eventually, but I would prefer that she isn't taken advantage of by some kid who got the wrong idea. I'd have to kill that kid and that's not right either.
There was a woman doing research on knowledge and pleasure in sex, through the last decades, interviewing people from 80, to kids from 15.
Scary outcome is that kids nowadays know a lot about hardcore sex, yet hardly anything about the pleasure of sex.
Best educated, and having most fun, where those who were in their teens in the end of the seventies.
Easy access to hard core porn on the internet made parents and school pay less and less attention on how to educate kids properly on fun and safety.
Any chance you could link some of that research?
And, this brings to mind (tangentially) an anecdote I may have shared before:
A friend of a friend a couple years back was very openly "kinky," and clearly enjoyed talking about some of the things she had done with her boyfriend of ~4 years (she was maybe 21, 22ish). Had been sexually active with the boyfriend before, poly with this guy for at least some of the relationship, talked about enjoying what she did with her boyfriend, said he was "good." Some creepy chinks in the armor, though. Approached me at one point at a party while drunk and asked if it was "safe," said I seemed likely to know, like she could trust me (she'd known me half a year at that point, and not very well)- then she ended up having a quickie with her boyfriend in the bathroom later that eve (apparently her feeling all skeeved out about safety didn't spoil the mood?). The guy had been in a fraternity and there were a couple of other stories I heard that sounded sketchy at best, like she was being victimized and didn't know, or didn't want to acknowledge it. One day she approached me and asked if antidepressants could make you permanently unable to orgasm- because she had been on them awhile as a teenager and she had never had one.
Somewhere in there, she'd gotten some really effed ideas about sex and sexuality. (I say this not because of the "kink" part, but because of the sum of what I ended up hearing/concluding.) Seems all too common. Like there's an idea that sex is something that one is "supposed" to have and "supposed" to enjoy, regardless of one's actual inclination. Not saying it was porn- I highly doubt porn was the most important part of whatever went wrong there- but something was clearly all fucked up in how she viewed sex and sexuality, and (this is based on additional info/impressions) probably in how he viewed sex and in how he viewed women.
The way it used to be twisted, to my understanding, was that women weren't supposed to enjoy it, that it was a duty. Now, we're mostly past that, I think, but it's still all screwed up. It's still scarily common to hear about people (the first two tend to be women far more than men) who have never had an orgasm, don't masturbate, don't understand their own sexuality and don't want to communicate about it. From what I've heard men and women say, it sounds like a lot of people seem to think really lousy sex (or worse) is the norm. Maybe it is?
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Quite simply, it is wrong for anyone to watch porn. :M :angel:
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Quite simply, it is wrong for anyone to watch porn. :M :angel:
:rofl:
:plus:
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Quite simply, it is wrong for anyone to watch porn. :M :angel:
:rofl:
:plus:
What odeon said.
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@ Elle, I think I can find it again. Give me a few days. It's a documentary series. Alas for you, it is in Dutch, but, who knows, there may be some information in English about it too.
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@ Elle, I think I can find it again. Give me a few days. It's a documentary series. Alas for you, it is in Dutch, but, who knows, there may be some information in English about it too.
Clearly, this means I have to learn dutch. :laugh:
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Dude If I had a kid, I wouldn't want e checking out dicks or cunts right in front of me, but its only human to bust a nut. I wouldn't be such a tyrant to try and control THAT.
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Teens should never be allowed to view porn, period.
They also should never be allowed to curse, gossip, chew gum, wear anything other than collared shirts, slacks (or knee-long skirts for females), shin-length socks (or knee-length for females), eat junk food and sweets, drink anything except for water, do drugs, talk to other teens, break any rules at school, run, chew, lick, spit, pick their nose, touch their private parts, have any sort of ego, talk about anything but church and family, be alone, have fun, masturbate, have sex with someone else, have sexual thoughts, be gay, vote, freedom of religion,...
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...move, or even make a goddamned sound period! Because it's WRONG! And I know what's right! :orly:
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Teens should never be allowed to view porn, period.
They also should never be allowed to curse, gossip, chew gum, wear anything other than collared shirts, slacks (or knee-long skirts for females), shin-length socks (or knee-length for females), eat junk food and sweets, drink anything except for water, do drugs, talk to other teens, break any rules at school, run, chew, lick, spit, pick their nose, touch their private parts, have any sort of ego, talk about anything but church and family, be alone, have fun, masturbate, have sex with someone else, have sexual thoughts, be gay, vote, freedom of religion,...
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...move, or even make a goddamned sound period! Because it's WRONG! And I know what's right! :orly:
Our resident :cbc: can say all that with a lot less words. :autism:
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Quite simply, it is wrong for anyone to watch porn. :M :angel:
There you go being a goody2shoes :pwned:
:laugh: :lolwat: :dwave: