INTENSITY²
Start here => Free For ALL => Topic started by: zer0 on March 25, 2009, 02:03:41 PM
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...love me twice today
love me two times, girl,
'cause I got AIDS
love me two times baby
once for tomorrow,
once 'cause I got AIDS
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:plus:
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AIDS
AIDS
AIDS
AIDS
AIDS
AIDS
AIDS
AIDS
AIDS
AIDS
AIDS
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:lol:
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AIDS is awesome. Everyone should have it.
I wish I had AIDS.
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:agreed:
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HITLER
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AIDS me in the Hitler.
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:hitler:
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RAUS!
(http://img12.imageshack.us/img12/3641/1236090210351yx1.jpg)
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:yikes:
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Did you hear about the dyslexic AIDSHitler who was eating breakfast?
He tried to exterminate the juice.
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:toporly:
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It is a hard life, being made out of ham.
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Well, hello and welcome back! :laugh:
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Pyaxis, you are a hot girl.....
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???
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???
If there were a contest, you'd win with out a vote...
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Ah. You dredged that up from waaay back. :P
But, I'm being hit on by the local cynical misanthrope? I'm not sure this is a good sign....
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Maybe it takes some one like you to show me the error of my ways.... :-*
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::)
One, I'm happily taken. Two, you're not my type of project.
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::)
One, I'm happily taken. Two, you're not my type of project.
Sweet dreams are made of these... who are we to disagree....
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Okay, enjoy your dreams, then. I hope I treat you well. :laugh:
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Damn it, I'm caving.
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It is a hard life, being made out of ham.
Can I have you over for Easter dinner you would go good with mustard
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Thank you parts!
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It is a hard life, being made out of ham.
[attachment deleted by admin]
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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ganzfeld_experiment
(http://www.bentoandstarchky.com/doodles/ganzfeld1.jpg)
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AIDSRAPE
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(http://www.bentoandstarchky.com/doodles/ganzfeld2.jpg)
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HITLERAIDS
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(http://www.bentoandstarchky.com/doodles/ganzfeld3.jpg)
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AIDS RAPE AIDS
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:thumbup:
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(http://www.bentoandstarchky.com/doodles/ganzfeld4.jpg)
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AIDS
AIDS
AIDS
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Man, I am a creative genius.
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:agreed:
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Ah. You dredged that up from waaay back. :P
But, I'm being hit on by the local cynical misanthrope? I'm not sure this is a good sign....
While misanthropes express a general dislike for humanity on the whole, they generally have normal relationships with specific people. Misanthropy may be motivated by feelings of isolation or social alienation, or simply contempt for the prevailing characteristics of humanity.
Misanthropy is commonly misinterpreted and distorted as a widespread and individualized hatred of humans. Because of this, the term often associates a great number of false negative tie-ins with the term. An extreme misanthrope may indeed hate the human species generally, but it does not necessarily entail psychopathy. Misanthropes can hold normal and intimate relationships with people, but they will often be very few and far between. They will typically be very selective with whom they choose to associate. This is also where their aversion is most prevalent, because their perspective shows an overriding contempt towards common human faults and weaknesses in others and, in some cases, themselves...
I am not cynical.... I'm a realistic misanthrope.....
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Sooo... I should have taken it as a compliment? That out of all the dregs of humanity you find around yourself, you consider this one worth interacting with?
Maybe cynical was the wrong word. I just found it funny that a guy with "there won't be another relationship" in his forum signature was attempting to flirt with me.
I live in a very realistic world. Doesn't make me cynical or a misanthrope.
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I hate optimists. :grrr:
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AIDS
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Sooo... I should have taken it as a compliment? That out of all the dregs of humanity you find around yourself, you consider this one worth interacting with?
Maybe cynical was the wrong word. I just found it funny that a guy with "there won't be another relationship" in his forum signature was attempting to flirt with me.
I live in a very realistic world. Doesn't make me cynical or a misanthrope.
Flirting is not a relationship. Dating, (in my book is not a relationship). Even living together (this may be a stretch for some) is only a sudo-relationship in my book, cause you can always walk.
I guess my definition of a relationship is one where the other person can totally and utterly destroy your life due to legal entanglements... So, I guess we need to nail down a common definition of relationship?
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Sooo... I should have taken it as a compliment? That out of all the dregs of humanity you find around yourself, you consider this one worth interacting with?
Maybe cynical was the wrong word. I just found it funny that a guy with "there won't be another relationship" in his forum signature was attempting to flirt with me.
I live in a very realistic world. Doesn't make me cynical or a misanthrope.
Flirting is not a relationship. Dating, (in my book is not a relationship). Even living together (this may be a stretch for some) is only a sudo-relationship in my book, cause you can always walk.
I guess my definition of a relationship is one where the other person can totally and utterly destroy your life due to legal entanglements... So, I guess we need to nail down a common definition of relationship?
The only relation you can not walk from, is the one with a siamese sibling.
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Sooo... I should have taken it as a compliment? That out of all the dregs of humanity you find around yourself, you consider this one worth interacting with?
Maybe cynical was the wrong word. I just found it funny that a guy with "there won't be another relationship" in his forum signature was attempting to flirt with me.
I live in a very realistic world. Doesn't make me cynical or a misanthrope.
Flirting is not a relationship. Dating, (in my book is not a relationship). Even living together (this may be a stretch for some) is only a sudo-relationship in my book, cause you can always walk.
I guess my definition of a relationship is one where the other person can totally and utterly destroy your life due to legal entanglements... So, I guess we need to nail down a common definition of relationship?
The only relation you can not walk from, is the one with a siamese sibling.
Spoken like a true female....
Umm, you need to talk to trigger... he'd have a word or two to say to you.
No, I mean walk away with out leaving all your assettes (and kids) behind... Some guys REALLY get taken to the cleaners... I wonder how a judge would devide a gay marriages' assesstes? "OK, who was on top most of the time?"
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Sooo... I should have taken it as a compliment? That out of all the dregs of humanity you find around yourself, you consider this one worth interacting with?
Maybe cynical was the wrong word. I just found it funny that a guy with "there won't be another relationship" in his forum signature was attempting to flirt with me.
I live in a very realistic world. Doesn't make me cynical or a misanthrope.
Flirting is not a relationship. Dating, (in my book is not a relationship). Even living together (this may be a stretch for some) is only a sudo-relationship in my book, cause you can always walk.
I guess my definition of a relationship is one where the other person can totally and utterly destroy your life due to legal entanglements... So, I guess we need to nail down a common definition of relationship?
The only relation you can not walk from, is the one with a siamese sibling.
Spoken like a true female....
Umm, you need to talk to trigger... he'd have a word or two to say to you.
No, I mean walk away with out leaving all your assettes (and kids) behind... Some guys REALLY get taken to the cleaners... I wonder how a judge would devide a gay marriages' assesstes? "OK, who was on top most of the time?"
You know, I've been left more than two and a half years ago. There is no relation anymore. But his address is still the same as mine. He's been telling me since august 2006 that he'll be gone within tree months. He lets me take care of almost everything. Kids, income, household. There is no relation. Though, there are still legal entanglements as long as he lives with me.
I'v given him all chances to take care of finding a place. He is the one hating it here. But it's likely that I'll start an eviction procedure next month. Unless he will take the last chance given to him.
No relation left. And when I'm working, and he is at home, the kids call me if they need help. They do not ask their dad.
I don't call that a relation. Though I'm legaly still very dependant of him. If he freaks out infront of his social worker, I'll suffer too in cutting income. Even when we are divorced.
I am in a love relation since half a year, with someone I've never laid my arms around. Because of the huge distance. No legal or financial entanglements. But absolutely a relation. One with very strong other entanglements.
Side note,
In a divorce here, custody over kids is shared custody by default. Equal rights to custody for both parents. In practice this often does still mean that kids are more with one parent than with the other, because of practical reasons. But when it comes to custody, it is default. Other arrangements are exceptions.
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Sooo... I should have taken it as a compliment? That out of all the dregs of humanity you find around yourself, you consider this one worth interacting with?
Maybe cynical was the wrong word. I just found it funny that a guy with "there won't be another relationship" in his forum signature was attempting to flirt with me.
I live in a very realistic world. Doesn't make me cynical or a misanthrope.
Flirting is not a relationship. Dating, (in my book is not a relationship). Even living together (this may be a stretch for some) is only a sudo-relationship in my book, cause you can always walk.
I guess my definition of a relationship is one where the other person can totally and utterly destroy your life due to legal entanglements... So, I guess we need to nail down a common definition of relationship?
The only relation you can not walk from, is the one with a siamese sibling.
Spoken like a true female....
Umm, you need to talk to trigger... he'd have a word or two to say to you.
No, I mean walk away with out leaving all your assettes (and kids) behind... Some guys REALLY get taken to the cleaners... I wonder how a judge would devide a gay marriages' assesstes? "OK, who was on top most of the time?"
You know, I've been left more than two and a half years ago. There is no relation anymore. But his address is still the same as mine. He's been telling me since august 2006 that he'll be gone within tree months. He lets me take care of almost everything. Kids, income, household. There is no relation. Though, there are still legal entanglements as long as he lives with me.
I'v given him all chances to take care of finding a place. He is the one hating it here. But it's likely that I'll start an eviction procedure next month. Unless he will take the last chance given to him.
No relation left. And when I'm working, and he is at home, the kids call me if they need help. They do not ask their dad.
I don't call that a relation. Though I'm legaly still very dependant of him. If he freaks out infront of his social worker, I'll suffer too in cutting income. Even when we are divorced.
I am in a love relation since half a year, with someone I've never laid my arms around. Because of the huge distance. No legal or financial entanglements. But absolutely a relation. One with very strong other entanglements.
Side note,
In a divorce here, custody over kids is shared custody by default. Equal rights to custody for both parents. In practice this often does still mean that kids are more with one parent than with the other, because of practical reasons. But when it comes to custody, it is default. Other arrangements are exceptions.
Spoken like a dumb female...
Never lived in Virginia, huh?
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...
Side note,
In a divorce here, custody over kids is shared custody by default. Equal rights to custody for both parents. In practice this often does still mean that kids are more with one parent than with the other, because of practical reasons. But when it comes to custody, it is default. Other arrangements are exceptions.
Spoken like a dumb female...
Never lived in Virginia, huh?
I believe Hyke is an intelligent female who lives in the Netherlands. She said, "in a divorce here custody over kids is shared custody by default."
In your own divorce where there was a question of custody, you gained custody of your daughter so why are you so upset about this issue?
Here is an answer from the Findlaw site regarding child custody automatically being awarded to mothers, although the actual law does vary betwen the states:
Do mothers automatically receive custody?
No. Under the laws of almost all states, mothers and fathers have an equal right to custody. Courts are not supposed to assume that a child is automatically better off with the mother or the father. Of course, judges, like the rest of us, are products of their background and personal experience. Some judges may have a deep-seated belief that mothers can take care of children better than fathers and that fathers have little experience in parenting. Conversely, some judges may believe that fathers are automatically better at raising boys--particularly older boys. Judges with such biases may apply these views when they decide custody cases, although they are supposed to base decisions on the facts of each case and not on automatic presumptions. As a group, judges are fair and unbiased in their decisions, and the level of bias is less than it was in years past. Bias on the part of individual judges can be avoided if the parents are able to decide between themselves what the custody or parenting arrangements should be.
In a contested custody case, both the father and mother have an equal burden of proving to the court that it is in the best interest of the child that the child be in his or her custody. There are a couple of states that have laws providing that if everything else is equal, the mother may be preferred; but even in those states, many fathers have been successful in obtaining custody.
In many states, judges are more likely to award custody of children to the primary caregiver, which would be the mother in many cases, but not necessarily. I found this checklist (I don't know why changing diapers is listed twice):
When parents cannot agree on a custody arrangement, the court is left with a tough decision. The court will consider many factors when deciding to whom to award custody. In many cases, a consideration of the various factors results in an award of custody to the parent who has been the child's primary caretaker. The following checklist can help you and your attorney establish who has been the primary caretaker in your family.
Who was usually or most often responsible for performing the following childcare responsibilities?
Task Mother Father Shared
Feeding infant ______ ______ ______
Feeding younger children ______ ______ ______
Changing diapers ______ ______ ______
Holding/cuddling ______ ______ ______
Preparing meals ______ ______ ______
Packing lunches ______ ______ ______
Grocery shopping ______ ______ ______
Changing diapers ______ ______ ______
Dressing ______ ______ ______
Doing laundry ______ ______ ______
Buying clothing ______ ______ ______
Maintaining clothing ______ ______ ______
Bathing ______ ______ ______
Washing hair ______ ______ ______
Styling hair ______ ______ ______
Brushing teeth (help with or enforce) ______ ______ ______
Putting to bed ______ ______ ______
Reading stories, books ______ ______ ______
Helping with homework ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from school ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from extracurricular activities ______ ______ ______
Conferencing with teachers ______ ______ ______
Attending school open houses ______ ______ ______
School volunteering ______ ______ ______
Choosing schools ______ ______ ______
Helping choose classes ______ ______ ______
Attending PTA/PTO meetings ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from religious services ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from religious classes ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from sports activities ______ ______ ______
Coaching sports teams ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from lessons ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from play dates ______ ______ ______
Arranging play dates ______ ______ ______
Hosting play dates ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from birthday parties ______ ______ ______
Hosting birthday parties ______ ______ ______
Shopping for gifts for friends ______ ______ ______
Shopping for gifts for child ______ ______ ______
Shopping for school supplies ______ ______ ______
Shopping for toiletries ______ ______ ______
Taking to doctor ______ ______ ______
Taking to dentist ______ ______ ______
Taking to orthodontist ______ ______ ______
Making doctor/dentist appointments ______ ______ ______
Taking care of sick child ______ ______ ______
Hiring babysitters ______ ______ ______
Picking up/dropping off babysitter ______ ______ ______
Arranging daycare ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from daycare ______ ______ ______
Planning holidays ______ ______ ______
Planning vacations ______ ______ ______
Teaching values ______ ______ ______
Teaching manners ______ ______ ______
Monitoring chores ______ ______ ______
Teaching sex education ______ ______ ______
Taking to park ______ ______ ______
Playing with indoors ______ ______ ______
Playing with outdoors ______ ______ ______
Cleaning home ______ ______ ______
Maintaining home ______ ______ ______
Other (please list):
________________________________ ______ ______ ______
________________________________ ______ ______ ______
Maybe this is why you are upset. If a family had an arrangement where the mother was the primary caregiver and the father was not, then the mother in that family would probably be more likely to be awarded physical custody by a judge in a divorce, assuming all other factors were equal.
-
...
Side note,
In a divorce here, custody over kids is shared custody by default. Equal rights to custody for both parents. In practice this often does still mean that kids are more with one parent than with the other, because of practical reasons. But when it comes to custody, it is default. Other arrangements are exceptions.
Spoken like a dumb female...
Never lived in Virginia, huh?
I believe Hyke is an intelligent female who lives in the Netherlands. She said, "in a divorce here custody over kids is shared custody by default."
In your own divorce where there was a question of custody, you gained custody of your daughter so why are you so upset about this issue?
Here is an answer from the Findlaw site regarding child custody automatically being awarded to mothers, although the actual law does vary betwen the states:
Do mothers automatically receive custody?
No. Under the laws of almost all states, mothers and fathers have an equal right to custody. Courts are not supposed to assume that a child is automatically better off with the mother or the father. Of course, judges, like the rest of us, are products of their background and personal experience. Some judges may have a deep-seated belief that mothers can take care of children better than fathers and that fathers have little experience in parenting. Conversely, some judges may believe that fathers are automatically better at raising boys--particularly older boys. Judges with such biases may apply these views when they decide custody cases, although they are supposed to base decisions on the facts of each case and not on automatic presumptions. As a group, judges are fair and unbiased in their decisions, and the level of bias is less than it was in years past. Bias on the part of individual judges can be avoided if the parents are able to decide between themselves what the custody or parenting arrangements should be.
In a contested custody case, both the father and mother have an equal burden of proving to the court that it is in the best interest of the child that the child be in his or her custody. There are a couple of states that have laws providing that if everything else is equal, the mother may be preferred; but even in those states, many fathers have been successful in obtaining custody.
In many states, judges are more likely to award custody of children to the primary caregiver, which would be the mother in many cases, but not necessarily. I found this checklist (I don't know why changing diapers is listed twice):
When parents cannot agree on a custody arrangement, the court is left with a tough decision. The court will consider many factors when deciding to whom to award custody. In many cases, a consideration of the various factors results in an award of custody to the parent who has been the child's primary caretaker. The following checklist can help you and your attorney establish who has been the primary caretaker in your family.
Who was usually or most often responsible for performing the following childcare responsibilities?
Task Mother Father Shared
Feeding infant ______ ______ ______
Feeding younger children ______ ______ ______
Changing diapers ______ ______ ______
Holding/cuddling ______ ______ ______
Preparing meals ______ ______ ______
Packing lunches ______ ______ ______
Grocery shopping ______ ______ ______
Changing diapers ______ ______ ______
Dressing ______ ______ ______
Doing laundry ______ ______ ______
Buying clothing ______ ______ ______
Maintaining clothing ______ ______ ______
Bathing ______ ______ ______
Washing hair ______ ______ ______
Styling hair ______ ______ ______
Brushing teeth (help with or enforce) ______ ______ ______
Putting to bed ______ ______ ______
Reading stories, books ______ ______ ______
Helping with homework ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from school ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from extracurricular activities ______ ______ ______
Conferencing with teachers ______ ______ ______
Attending school open houses ______ ______ ______
School volunteering ______ ______ ______
Choosing schools ______ ______ ______
Helping choose classes ______ ______ ______
Attending PTA/PTO meetings ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from religious services ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from religious classes ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from sports activities ______ ______ ______
Coaching sports teams ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from lessons ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from play dates ______ ______ ______
Arranging play dates ______ ______ ______
Hosting play dates ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from birthday parties ______ ______ ______
Hosting birthday parties ______ ______ ______
Shopping for gifts for friends ______ ______ ______
Shopping for gifts for child ______ ______ ______
Shopping for school supplies ______ ______ ______
Shopping for toiletries ______ ______ ______
Taking to doctor ______ ______ ______
Taking to dentist ______ ______ ______
Taking to orthodontist ______ ______ ______
Making doctor/dentist appointments ______ ______ ______
Taking care of sick child ______ ______ ______
Hiring babysitters ______ ______ ______
Picking up/dropping off babysitter ______ ______ ______
Arranging daycare ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from daycare ______ ______ ______
Planning holidays ______ ______ ______
Planning vacations ______ ______ ______
Teaching values ______ ______ ______
Teaching manners ______ ______ ______
Monitoring chores ______ ______ ______
Teaching sex education ______ ______ ______
Taking to park ______ ______ ______
Playing with indoors ______ ______ ______
Playing with outdoors ______ ______ ______
Cleaning home ______ ______ ______
Maintaining home ______ ______ ______
Other (please list):
________________________________ ______ ______ ______
________________________________ ______ ______ ______
Maybe this is why you are upset. If a family had an arrangement where the mother was the primary caregiver and the father was not, then the mother in that family would probably be more likely to be awarded physical custody by a judge in a divorce, assuming all other factors were equal.
Thank you Callaway.
Here is the Netherlands indeed. There is a difference in custody and caretaking. Custody is shared by default, unless there are strong reasons to act differently. Like abuse. Caretaking, well, more and more co-parenting is happening, possible if parents still both live in a reasonable distance from the school of the kids. In that case children spend half of their time with each parent. For the rest, yes, more kids end up having more time with their mothers than with their fathers. Because of practicalities. Dads having bigger jobs etc. Not fair. I agree. But it still happens. From 12 years on children have their own say in where they want to be, with their dad or with their mum.
And I've seen awful behaviour, both of dads and mums, to get the kids with them. Mudslinging, false accusations, bribing of kids. But most of the time it goes OK. And lots of couples that split up hire just one lawyer, representing both parties.
My ex and I were/are aiming at co-parenting. But the way my ex is now, that's not an option. He admits that himself too. Maybe he'll be more stable, once he lives on his own for a while. I sure hope so. For the kids and for him.
And about 'dumb female'. Since it is coming from you DriftingBlizzard, I take it as coming from you. Suspecting you think that of almost all women, by default. ;D
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...
Side note,
In a divorce here, custody over kids is shared custody by default. Equal rights to custody for both parents. In practice this often does still mean that kids are more with one parent than with the other, because of practical reasons. But when it comes to custody, it is default. Other arrangements are exceptions.
Spoken like a dumb female...
Never lived in Virginia, huh?
I believe Hyke is an intelligent female who lives in the Netherlands. She said, "in a divorce here custody over kids is shared custody by default."
In your own divorce where there was a question of custody, you gained custody of your daughter so why are you so upset about this issue?
Here is an answer from the Findlaw site regarding child custody automatically being awarded to mothers, although the actual law does vary betwen the states:
Do mothers automatically receive custody?
No. Under the laws of almost all states, mothers and fathers have an equal right to custody. Courts are not supposed to assume that a child is automatically better off with the mother or the father. Of course, judges, like the rest of us, are products of their background and personal experience. Some judges may have a deep-seated belief that mothers can take care of children better than fathers and that fathers have little experience in parenting. Conversely, some judges may believe that fathers are automatically better at raising boys--particularly older boys. Judges with such biases may apply these views when they decide custody cases, although they are supposed to base decisions on the facts of each case and not on automatic presumptions. As a group, judges are fair and unbiased in their decisions, and the level of bias is less than it was in years past. Bias on the part of individual judges can be avoided if the parents are able to decide between themselves what the custody or parenting arrangements should be.
In a contested custody case, both the father and mother have an equal burden of proving to the court that it is in the best interest of the child that the child be in his or her custody. There are a couple of states that have laws providing that if everything else is equal, the mother may be preferred; but even in those states, many fathers have been successful in obtaining custody.
In many states, judges are more likely to award custody of children to the primary caregiver, which would be the mother in many cases, but not necessarily. I found this checklist (I don't know why changing diapers is listed twice):
When parents cannot agree on a custody arrangement, the court is left with a tough decision. The court will consider many factors when deciding to whom to award custody. In many cases, a consideration of the various factors results in an award of custody to the parent who has been the child's primary caretaker. The following checklist can help you and your attorney establish who has been the primary caretaker in your family.
Who was usually or most often responsible for performing the following childcare responsibilities?
Task Mother Father Shared
Feeding infant ______ ______ ______
Feeding younger children ______ ______ ______
Changing diapers ______ ______ ______
Holding/cuddling ______ ______ ______
Preparing meals ______ ______ ______
Packing lunches ______ ______ ______
Grocery shopping ______ ______ ______
Changing diapers ______ ______ ______
Dressing ______ ______ ______
Doing laundry ______ ______ ______
Buying clothing ______ ______ ______
Maintaining clothing ______ ______ ______
Bathing ______ ______ ______
Washing hair ______ ______ ______
Styling hair ______ ______ ______
Brushing teeth (help with or enforce) ______ ______ ______
Putting to bed ______ ______ ______
Reading stories, books ______ ______ ______
Helping with homework ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from school ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from extracurricular activities ______ ______ ______
Conferencing with teachers ______ ______ ______
Attending school open houses ______ ______ ______
School volunteering ______ ______ ______
Choosing schools ______ ______ ______
Helping choose classes ______ ______ ______
Attending PTA/PTO meetings ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from religious services ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from religious classes ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from sports activities ______ ______ ______
Coaching sports teams ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from lessons ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from play dates ______ ______ ______
Arranging play dates ______ ______ ______
Hosting play dates ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from birthday parties ______ ______ ______
Hosting birthday parties ______ ______ ______
Shopping for gifts for friends ______ ______ ______
Shopping for gifts for child ______ ______ ______
Shopping for school supplies ______ ______ ______
Shopping for toiletries ______ ______ ______
Taking to doctor ______ ______ ______
Taking to dentist ______ ______ ______
Taking to orthodontist ______ ______ ______
Making doctor/dentist appointments ______ ______ ______
Taking care of sick child ______ ______ ______
Hiring babysitters ______ ______ ______
Picking up/dropping off babysitter ______ ______ ______
Arranging daycare ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from daycare ______ ______ ______
Planning holidays ______ ______ ______
Planning vacations ______ ______ ______
Teaching values ______ ______ ______
Teaching manners ______ ______ ______
Monitoring chores ______ ______ ______
Teaching sex education ______ ______ ______
Taking to park ______ ______ ______
Playing with indoors ______ ______ ______
Playing with outdoors ______ ______ ______
Cleaning home ______ ______ ______
Maintaining home ______ ______ ______
Other (please list):
________________________________ ______ ______ ______
________________________________ ______ ______ ______
Maybe this is why you are upset. If a family had an arrangement where the mother was the primary caregiver and the father was not, then the mother in that family would probably be more likely to be awarded physical custody by a judge in a divorce, assuming all other factors were equal.
Thank you Callaway.
Here is the Netherlands indeed. There is a difference in custody and caretaking. Custody is shared by default, unless there are strong reasons to act differently. Like abuse. Caretaking, well, more and more co-parenting is happening, possible if parents still both live in a reasonable distance from the school of the kids. In that case children spend half of their time with each parent. For the rest, yes, more kids end up having more time with their mothers than with their fathers. Because of practicalities. Dads having bigger jobs etc. Not fair. I agree. But it still happens. From 12 years on children have their own say in where they want to be, with their dad or with their mum.
And I've seen awful behaviour, both of dads and mums, to get the kids with them. Mudslinging, false accusations, bribing of kids. But most of the time it goes OK. And lots of couples that split up hire just one lawyer, representing both parties.
My ex and I were/are aiming at co-parenting. But the way my ex is now, that's not an option. He admits that himself too. Maybe he'll be more stable, once he lives on his own for a while. I sure hope so. For the kids and for him.
And about 'dumb female'. Since it is coming from you DriftingBlizzard, I take it as coming from you. Suspecting you think that of almost all women, by default. ;D
I offer my sincerest appologies to everyone but Hykeswell. I didn't mean for that comment to be taken as an insult to anyone but her. She said something, no matter where she is from as if it is a truth everywhere. That's why I said its a dumb comment. And she is female.
And for her to infer that I meant every woman was dumb is just Biggotted and sexist. Its like if I said, 'there goes a green car" she was inferring that I thought all cars were green. nope, just her's. And anyone is welcome to come to her defense, but I stand by my comment. In the known galaxay, women have by far ended up with the kids more often that not. Its the default judgement especially in tough cases. The tie usually goes to the woman. period.
So now, I guess I have to award her with the second serving of that's another dumb comment. See bolding above.
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...
Side note,
In a divorce here, custody over kids is shared custody by default. Equal rights to custody for both parents. In practice this often does still mean that kids are more with one parent than with the other, because of practical reasons. But when it comes to custody, it is default. Other arrangements are exceptions.
Spoken like a dumb female...
Never lived in Virginia, huh?
I believe Hyke is an intelligent female who lives in the Netherlands. She said, "in a divorce here custody over kids is shared custody by default."
In your own divorce where there was a question of custody, you gained custody of your daughter so why are you so upset about this issue?
Here is an answer from the Findlaw site regarding child custody automatically being awarded to mothers, although the actual law does vary betwen the states:
Do mothers automatically receive custody?
No. Under the laws of almost all states, mothers and fathers have an equal right to custody. Courts are not supposed to assume that a child is automatically better off with the mother or the father. Of course, judges, like the rest of us, are products of their background and personal experience. Some judges may have a deep-seated belief that mothers can take care of children better than fathers and that fathers have little experience in parenting. Conversely, some judges may believe that fathers are automatically better at raising boys--particularly older boys. Judges with such biases may apply these views when they decide custody cases, although they are supposed to base decisions on the facts of each case and not on automatic presumptions. As a group, judges are fair and unbiased in their decisions, and the level of bias is less than it was in years past. Bias on the part of individual judges can be avoided if the parents are able to decide between themselves what the custody or parenting arrangements should be.
In a contested custody case, both the father and mother have an equal burden of proving to the court that it is in the best interest of the child that the child be in his or her custody. There are a couple of states that have laws providing that if everything else is equal, the mother may be preferred; but even in those states, many fathers have been successful in obtaining custody.
In many states, judges are more likely to award custody of children to the primary caregiver, which would be the mother in many cases, but not necessarily. I found this checklist (I don't know why changing diapers is listed twice):
When parents cannot agree on a custody arrangement, the court is left with a tough decision. The court will consider many factors when deciding to whom to award custody. In many cases, a consideration of the various factors results in an award of custody to the parent who has been the child's primary caretaker. The following checklist can help you and your attorney establish who has been the primary caretaker in your family.
Who was usually or most often responsible for performing the following childcare responsibilities?
Task Mother Father Shared
Feeding infant ______ ______ ______
Feeding younger children ______ ______ ______
Changing diapers ______ ______ ______
Holding/cuddling ______ ______ ______
Preparing meals ______ ______ ______
Packing lunches ______ ______ ______
Grocery shopping ______ ______ ______
Changing diapers ______ ______ ______
Dressing ______ ______ ______
Doing laundry ______ ______ ______
Buying clothing ______ ______ ______
Maintaining clothing ______ ______ ______
Bathing ______ ______ ______
Washing hair ______ ______ ______
Styling hair ______ ______ ______
Brushing teeth (help with or enforce) ______ ______ ______
Putting to bed ______ ______ ______
Reading stories, books ______ ______ ______
Helping with homework ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from school ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from extracurricular activities ______ ______ ______
Conferencing with teachers ______ ______ ______
Attending school open houses ______ ______ ______
School volunteering ______ ______ ______
Choosing schools ______ ______ ______
Helping choose classes ______ ______ ______
Attending PTA/PTO meetings ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from religious services ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from religious classes ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from sports activities ______ ______ ______
Coaching sports teams ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from lessons ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from play dates ______ ______ ______
Arranging play dates ______ ______ ______
Hosting play dates ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from birthday parties ______ ______ ______
Hosting birthday parties ______ ______ ______
Shopping for gifts for friends ______ ______ ______
Shopping for gifts for child ______ ______ ______
Shopping for school supplies ______ ______ ______
Shopping for toiletries ______ ______ ______
Taking to doctor ______ ______ ______
Taking to dentist ______ ______ ______
Taking to orthodontist ______ ______ ______
Making doctor/dentist appointments ______ ______ ______
Taking care of sick child ______ ______ ______
Hiring babysitters ______ ______ ______
Picking up/dropping off babysitter ______ ______ ______
Arranging daycare ______ ______ ______
Taking to/picking up from daycare ______ ______ ______
Planning holidays ______ ______ ______
Planning vacations ______ ______ ______
Teaching values ______ ______ ______
Teaching manners ______ ______ ______
Monitoring chores ______ ______ ______
Teaching sex education ______ ______ ______
Taking to park ______ ______ ______
Playing with indoors ______ ______ ______
Playing with outdoors ______ ______ ______
Cleaning home ______ ______ ______
Maintaining home ______ ______ ______
Other (please list):
________________________________ ______ ______ ______
________________________________ ______ ______ ______
Maybe this is why you are upset. If a family had an arrangement where the mother was the primary caregiver and the father was not, then the mother in that family would probably be more likely to be awarded physical custody by a judge in a divorce, assuming all other factors were equal.
Thank you Callaway.
Here is the Netherlands indeed. There is a difference in custody and caretaking. Custody is shared by default, unless there are strong reasons to act differently. Like abuse. Caretaking, well, more and more co-parenting is happening, possible if parents still both live in a reasonable distance from the school of the kids. In that case children spend half of their time with each parent. For the rest, yes, more kids end up having more time with their mothers than with their fathers. Because of practicalities. Dads having bigger jobs etc. Not fair. I agree. But it still happens. From 12 years on children have their own say in where they want to be, with their dad or with their mum.
And I've seen awful behaviour, both of dads and mums, to get the kids with them. Mudslinging, false accusations, bribing of kids. But most of the time it goes OK. And lots of couples that split up hire just one lawyer, representing both parties.
My ex and I were/are aiming at co-parenting. But the way my ex is now, that's not an option. He admits that himself too. Maybe he'll be more stable, once he lives on his own for a while. I sure hope so. For the kids and for him.
And about 'dumb female'. Since it is coming from you DriftingBlizzard, I take it as coming from you. Suspecting you think that of almost all women, by default. ;D
I offer my sincerest appologies to everyone but Hykeswell. I didn't mean for that comment to be taken as an insult to anyone but her. She said something, no matter where she is from as if it is a truth everywhere. That's why I said its a dumb comment. And she is female.
And for her to infer that I meant every woman was dumb is just Biggotted and sexist. Its like if I said, 'there goes a green car" she was inferring that I thought all cars were green. nope, just her's. And anyone is welcome to come to her defense, but I stand by my comment. In the known galaxay, women have by far ended up with the kids more often that not. Its the default judgement especially in tough cases. The tie usually goes to the woman. period.
So now, I guess I have to award her with the second serving of that's another dumb comment. See bolding above.
I still think the only relation you cannot walk out, is the one with a siamese sibling.
But that does not mean that walking out of relations is easy.
I reacted on your post, because you made it as if any relation was easy to walk out, except the one with legal entanglements. That I do wholeheartedly disagree with. There are many ways to be entangled in a relation. Not only legal. And all can be hard to end. And even when all entanglements have ended, still responsibility, loyalty and practical reasons can make it hard to walk out of something that is no relation anymore.
Further I am well aware that women do often end up with the kids. And I do think that that is a major injustice. When a couple breaks up, it's the couple that breaks up. And denying the kids to see their dad, it is mostly the dad that suffers from a treatment like that, is denying children to see half of their origin. Raising kids while slandering the other parent, happening both ways a lot , is slandering half of the kids themselves. Then their origin is slandered. As if they are only loved for half of who they are. Very unfair.
Kids have a right to both parents, if possible. It is sad, and cruel, when a parent is not allowed to see his kids. Sadder even more when he or she does not want to see the kids anymore. Because the child can not even dream of it happening one day then.
The joint custody by default is not that old here in the Netherlands in legislation. But I'm glad it's there. It is a step in the right direction I think.
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Oh, DB, I do take back the 'by default' in my remark about you. That was mean. Crappy mood sometimes lately.
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are you sure you like niggers
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AIDS
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ARE YOU SURE YOU LIKE NIGGER
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AIDS
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AIDS
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AIDS
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:plus:
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JAG SKA NIGGRA DEJ INUTI HITLER DITT JÄVLA HITLERNIGG
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Psst, grabbar; gillar ni Hitler?
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:indeed:
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LET'S TAX THE BOATMAN'S FARE!! REMOVE ONE PENNY FROM THE EYE OF EVERY CARCASS!!
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NIGGERS :headbang2:
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O0 O0 O0 O0 O0 O0 O0 O0 O0 O0
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JAG SKA KVOTERA IN DIG I (S)VERIGE1!!
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ALLAH SKALL MED!
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EEEEEEEEEEYY, Håll keften, svenne!
Jak forsokka kolla "Taxi Driver", her, Svenne!
Jak forsokka vara polisk korrekt!
Jak fårsåkka minnas att nar the drains finally scab over, all the vermin will drown.
EEY! SVENNE!
Fåck yåou1!!
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ey vaffan jefla svenne
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Jak varnar dej! Jak vet var din brevlåda bor, jak vet var din skorsten ryker, va!
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Tom: Now look, you have to emphasize the mandatory welfare program. That's the issue that should be pushed.
Betsy: First push the man, then the issue. Senator Palantine is a dynamic man, an intelligent, interesting, fresh, fascinating...
Tom: Forgot sexy.
Betsy: ...man. I did not forget sexy.
Tom: Listen to what you're saying. You sound like you're selling mouthwash.
Betsy: We are selling mouthwash.
Tom: Are we authorized to do that?
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De e cooolt å betala skatt! Heeeftit, asså!
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Travis: Well, I know you and I ain't talked too much, you know, but I figured you've been around a lot so you could...
Wizard: Shoot. That's why they call me the Wizard.
Travis: I got, it's just that I got a, I got a...
Wizard: Things uh, things got ya down?
Travis: Yeah.
Wizard: Yeah, it happens to the best of us.
Travis: Yeah, I got me a real down, real...I just wanna go out and, and you know like really, really, really do somethin'.
Wizard: The taxi life you mean?
Travis: Yeah, well. Naw, I don't know. I just wanna go out. I really, you know, I really wanna, I got some bad ideas in my head, I just...
Wizard: Look, look at it this way, you know uh, a man, a man takes a job, you know, and that job, I mean like that, and that it becomes what he is. You know like uh, you do a thing and that's what you are. Like I've been a, I've been a cabbie for seventeen years, ten years at night and I still don't own my own cab. You know why? 'Cause I don't want to. I must be what I, what I want. You know, to be on the night shift drivin' somebody else's cab. Understand? You, you, you become, you get a job, you you become the job. One guy lives in Brooklyn, one guy lives in Sutton Place, you get a lawyer, another guy's a doctor, another guy dies, another guy gets well, and you know, people are born. I envy you your youth. Go out and get laid. Get drunk, you know, do anything. 'Cause you got no choice anyway. I mean we're all fucked, more or less you know?
Travis: Yeah, I don't know. That's about the dumbest thing I ever heard.
Wizard: I'm not Bertrand Russell. Well what do ya want. I'm a cabbie you know. What do I know?
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Oh, DB, I do take back the 'by default' in my remark about you. That was mean. Crappy mood sometimes lately.
:plus: Not a problem, I don't mind when someone says something that is truthful, but I will call them on it when its not. Thanks for getting back to me.
But this thread has really gone down hill...
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If you knew Swedish language and politics, it'd be hilarious.
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But this thread has really gone down hill...
That'll teach you not to try and be serious in a thread I've started.
Don't you have ANY respect for the victims of AIDS??
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Victims of aids<--->Me
:hahaha:
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Let's find an infant and fuck the AIDS away! :headbang2: :headbang2: :headbang2:
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:agreed:
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Lets move to Yemen, everyone! :zoinks:
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::)
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B!R!A!V!E! :arrr:
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Lets move to Yemen, everyone! :zoinks:
If you touched a child in Yemen, the least possible punishment that would happen to you under Sharia law would be 100 lashes with a whip and exile.
The worst punishment would be that they would bury you up to your neck and throw stones at your head until you died.
They take sex crimes very seriously there and no muslim father would ever allow you to marry his daughter, whether she was a child or not.
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Let's bomb Yemen, then. I can get 15 yo
whores girls without even leaving Sweden. :arrr:
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They take sex crimes very seriously there and no muslim father would ever allow you to marry his daughter, whether she was a child or not.
Unlike when (sand)niggers gang rape Swedish girls and get away with it or get 2 months "youth care" if they're under 21. :grrr:
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They take sex crimes very seriously there and no muslim father would ever allow you to marry his daughter, whether she was a child or not.
Unlike when (sand)niggers gang rape Swedish girls and get away with it or get 2 months "youth care" if they're under 21. :grrr:
They SHOULD cut their dicks off, but Liberal Scandinavians love the taste of Arab cock. :trollface: