INTENSITY²
Start here => Games => Topic started by: ZEGH8578 on December 18, 2009, 04:36:42 AM
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two days ago everything's cute and charming, recieved a very sweet gms photo on my phone and stuff
today, its finished. why? not sure.
no resentment tho. cus shes nice. in fact, in this world, my best fit ever. probably aspie chick. she registered to WP to lurk. knew her from online since we were teens, but went many years without contact. re-contacted half a year ago.
theres been nothing but pure bliss every single day untill... two days ago. yesterday and day before were silent, unenthusiastic and silent, and today its finished.
out of the blue.
its not another guy either, shes not that social. i think she just got cought up into the pessimism of no-hope-for-the-future long-distance-wise. thats always something to be aware of, but i didnt expect it to cause such a sudden breakdown.
what gets me tho, is that chicks, in my experience, seem to want to prompt a guessing game. your supposed to guess that they suddenly dont like you anymore, and of course guess that its over, and guess that maybe it was over 2 days ago for that matter, and that i shoulda guessed.
still... i dont resent her. as i said, it was the best fit ive ever known. pretty much down hill from here :D
im gonna get stoned now.
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Dude this post considering the abundance of women here is the equivalent of this :kapow:
:D
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Aw hell Les! I've been out of the chick stage for that bloody long, I took no offence.
/old boiler
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^ you're right.
Zegh could ask her what is going on.
Being a happy item that long, she's entitled to give him that I think.
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Aw hell Les! I've been out of the chick stage for that bloody long, I took no offence.
/old boiler
Oh I know most of the women here are atypical females anyhow. I am thinking most places it would go down like a toenail sandwich and that is one of the many things I love about you guys/girls and this place in general. It was just fun to post that.
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Aw hell Les! I've been out of the chick stage for that bloody long, I took no offence.
/old boiler
Oh I know most of the women here are atypical females anyhow. I am thinking most places it would go down like a toenail sandwich and that is one of the many things I love about you guys/girls and this place in general. It was just fun to post that.
You're a bad man. :eyebrows: And we know it.
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That sounds more like an NT head game than anything else, Zegh. You sure she's aspie? She may just be anti-social. I don't get stuff like that and why chicks do it. But then again I'm not anything like that. I have no filter so I say exactly what's on my mind. I'd ask her what happened.
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That sounds more like an NT head game than anything else, Zegh. You sure she's aspie? She may just be anti-social. I don't get stuff like that and why chicks do it. But then again I'm not anything like that. I have no filter so I say exactly what's on my mind. I'd ask her what happened.
Ouch, CG. :/
I think it sounds like she's got her own issues. Being that intensely into you and then being that intensely not with no identifiable trigger isn't normal.
My question is why is this in the games forum?
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My question is why is this in the games forum?
Cause the bitch be playin games :orly:
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That sounds more like an NT head game than anything else, Zegh. You sure she's aspie? She may just be anti-social. I don't get stuff like that and why chicks do it. But then again I'm not anything like that. I have no filter so I say exactly what's on my mind. I'd ask her what happened.
shes a total aspie :D
i saw it coming, but i was hoping it was under control. the logical fallacy of a long-distance relationship finally became too great. one day shes fine with it, the next she really isnt...
plus i am ABSOLUTELY sure there is an instinctive/emotional factor, that i was headed for head first: by noticing her lack of interest, i got worried, and thus i just tenfolded her lack of interest by seeming ever-so clingy. i even tried not to, but how do you ignore being ignored?? especially when its so unexpected...
she went silent for the past two days, the kind of silence that murders you ESPECIALLY when their only interactions with you are short and to the point, clear hints for you to piss off. so i asked what was up today, and she said she had basically lost interest. and there was absolutely NO sign of trouble before that 2 days of quiet. none whatsoever :(
its still recent and fresh in my head, ill get over it. its just that my FEW previous dumps were done by chicks who were fucked up anyway. afterwards i can think back to all the bad sides of their personalities. here is nothing. she was astonishingly perfect in my mind. she watches more movies than i do... :(
gah :(
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Do you think it would do any good to talk to her?
How long was the distance?
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Do you think it would do any good to talk to her?
How long was the distance?
there was no hostility. just weirdness... it was far. stupid. it just sucks. i dont like anybody. everyone i know seems to settle, they are idiots and pick idiots themselves to be with. if i wanted an idiot chick, ive had the oportunity to have one many times before. i despise most people.
i didnt dislike a single thing about her. not a single thing :(
it just sucks... friendship went over into something else, and from there into nothing at all. ive known her since i was 16 or 17, and since today morning we're not talking anymore...
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That sounds more like an NT head game than anything else, Zegh. You sure she's aspie? She may just be anti-social. I don't get stuff like that and why chicks do it. But then again I'm not anything like that. I have no filter so I say exactly what's on my mind. I'd ask her what happened.
Ouch, CG. :/
Sorry, Elle. I didn't explain myself well with that now did I. :facepalm2: I was thinking of a conversation EBM and I had awhile ago about something similar and the differences between ASD women and NT women and that's where my headspace was at when I wrote it. But it didn't come across like I intended it to. :P
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cg, this wasnt some mindless idea or something...
it was very abrupt and unexpected yes, but it had always been in the background of it... i guess we conciously gambled the friendship on it, knowing what was coming, but of course keeping a small hope. she just went and smashed hope :green: :( it was a small and unrealistic hope tho... i just woulda preffered to keep the illusion up a little longer
as i said, i was completely completely taken by her being and personality...
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Bah. I'm talking myself into a hole here. :facepalm2: I wasn't insinuating that either, Zegh. I'm going to stay out of this thread now. :P
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Maybe she wasnt that into you and didn't want to drag something out that she didn't want for the long term.
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That sounds more like an NT head game than anything else, Zegh. You sure she's aspie? She may just be anti-social. I don't get stuff like that and why chicks do it. But then again I'm not anything like that. I have no filter so I say exactly what's on my mind. I'd ask her what happened.
Common misconception that aspies dont play head games there. Its often harder for aspies to say whats on their minds if they care what people think, and they've got no social skills.
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yeah, something like that. i think she just got very "in love" initially, and when it wore off she was left with a long-distance thing that would most likely only cause pain.
i get it, we even talked about it.
it sucks for me tho, cus shes hot, she can get a new guy whenever she wants. and like most chicks, she has a stupid habit of getting idiots who beat her up. WHY WHY WHY do girls want guys who beat them up?
and so i have to sit here, no friends, no nothing, knowing that some asshole beats her up, and still she will love him back.
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yeah, something like that. i think she just got very "in love" initially, and when it wore off she was left with a long-distance thing that would most likely only cause pain.
i get it, we even talked about it.
it sucks for me tho, cus shes hot, she can get a new guy whenever she wants. and like most chicks, she has a stupid habit of getting idiots who beat her up. WHY WHY WHY do girls want guys who beat them up?
and so i have to sit here, no friends, no nothing, knowing that some asshole beats her up, and still she will love him back.
I'm sorry you are suffering through this and I hope she will be OK too.
I was in a long-distance relationship with my husband for years before we were married so I know how difficult this type of relationship can be.
As to why women sometimes get into relationships with guys who wind up hitting them, I don't know why this is.
I wonder if perhaps they get into a controlling relationship with a possessive man and mistake that jealousy and possessiveness for depth of feeling and then when the woman later expresses her individuality in any way the possessive man feels he is losing control and then tends to become violent to exert or maintain that control.
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Sometimes certain character traits in men that are exciting to women also come with violence. Sometimes they grew up in a violent home and violence is what they are used to and understand. As in they have skill sets that are designed with coping with violence and being in a non-violent relationship makes them very uncomfortable as they don't know how to predict or cope with it.
Strange but true.
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Sometimes certain character traits in men that are exciting to women also come with violence. Sometimes they grew up in a violent home and violence is what they are used to and understand. As in they have skill sets that are designed with coping with violence and being in a non-violent relationship makes them very uncomfortable as they don't know how to predict or cope with it.
Strange but true.
So very true. The pattern of violence and remorse/making up is familiar and safe.
After the violence there is a certain time of calm.
In a non-violent relationship, it is almost impossible to believe in the calm for them. And they are on the allert 24/7, never feeling safe.
I knew someone working with battered woman and children. She knew how hard it was for them to get out, because she had been in a short term violent relation, but the pattern of trusting safety after abuse had engrained itself very quickly in her.
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Yes. After a big blowup, the offending party shows a great deal of contrition and remorse, and does his/her best to convince the other that "it'll never happen again." It's like being wooed all over again. Even a normally-skeptical person can be drawn in by this.
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yeah, its the alpha-male thing, by nature chicks lean towards it, and by nature alpha-males come with anger issues and violence.
ah well... i tried contacting her, in a casual manner, she replied, friendly, but very very short. clear hint to not wanting to talk anymore.
this is, to me, very hard to understand. one thing is not wanting to be all serious relationship-wise, but cut off all contact? there wasnt even an argument or anger or offense or anything... it seems so weird to suddenly behave like enemies :S
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yeah, its the alpha-male thing, by nature chicks lean towards it, and by nature alpha-males come with anger issues and violence.
ah well... i tried contacting her, in a casual manner, she replied, friendly, but very very short. clear hint to not wanting to talk anymore.
this is, to me, very hard to understand. one thing is not wanting to be all serious relationship-wise, but cut off all contact? there wasnt even an argument or anger or offense or anything... it seems so weird to suddenly behave like enemies :S
Maybe she still likes you a lot and talking to you just hurts too much because she is desperately trying to cut things off.
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yeah, its the alpha-male thing, by nature chicks lean towards it, and by nature alpha-males come with anger issues and violence.
ah well... i tried contacting her, in a casual manner, she replied, friendly, but very very short. clear hint to not wanting to talk anymore.
this is, to me, very hard to understand. one thing is not wanting to be all serious relationship-wise, but cut off all contact? there wasnt even an argument or anger or offense or anything... it seems so weird to suddenly behave like enemies :S
Maybe she still likes you a lot and talking to you just hurts too much because she is desperately trying to cut things off.
I really doubt that is the case. You're reading into things too much. If she liked him that much she wouldn't cut him off. Its not like he dumped her, in that case what you said may apply.
Sounds like she just lost interest in him. Which is a shame, but we all go though it you just have to move on.
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yeah, its the alpha-male thing, by nature chicks lean towards it, and by nature alpha-males come with anger issues and violence.
ah well... i tried contacting her, in a casual manner, she replied, friendly, but very very short. clear hint to not wanting to talk anymore.
this is, to me, very hard to understand. one thing is not wanting to be all serious relationship-wise, but cut off all contact? there wasnt even an argument or anger or offense or anything... it seems so weird to suddenly behave like enemies :S
Maybe she still likes you a lot and talking to you just hurts too much because she is desperately trying to cut things off.
I really doubt that is the case. You're reading into things too much. If she liked him that much she wouldn't cut him off. Its not like he dumped her, in that case what you said may apply.
Sounds like she just lost interest in him. Which is a shame, but we all go though it you just have to move on.
that is the root of it. only, it was very sudden. she was initiating contact, being all intimate and cute and all, and litterally two days later we dont even talk anymore.
if i didnt know her better, i would have been convinced she fell flat for some new guy. but shes not the type.
as i understood it, she wanted to cut it off completely, rather than to have something "more or less" or something. either way, your right. moving on :]
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yeah, its the alpha-male thing, by nature chicks lean towards it, and by nature alpha-males come with anger issues and violence.
ah well... i tried contacting her, in a casual manner, she replied, friendly, but very very short. clear hint to not wanting to talk anymore.
this is, to me, very hard to understand. one thing is not wanting to be all serious relationship-wise, but cut off all contact? there wasnt even an argument or anger or offense or anything... it seems so weird to suddenly behave like enemies :S
Maybe she still likes you a lot and talking to you just hurts too much because she is desperately trying to cut things off.
I really doubt that is the case. You're reading into things too much. If she liked him that much she wouldn't cut him off. Its not like he dumped her, in that case what you said may apply.
Sounds like she just lost interest in him. Which is a shame, but we all go though it you just have to move on.
that is the root of it. only, it was very sudden. she was initiating contact, being all intimate and cute and all, and litterally two days later we dont even talk anymore.
if i didnt know her better, i would have been convinced she fell flat for some new guy. but shes not the type.
as i understood it, she wanted to cut it off completely, rather than to have something "more or less" or something. either way, your right. moving on :]
Maybe something about you suddenly started to bother her. I dunno, seems kinda weird. But women are fickle beings. Just remember its not you with the problem.
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Unfortunately, Zegh, you may never find out exactly what prompted her sudden withdrawal. (As unfair and frustrating as that is.) Fiona is right: it's more her problem than yours.
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i know. thanx :]
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I know I keep saying this but it comes back to you. You can't "make people like you" or control them. You can control you and work on the things that make you content. Anything more is a bonus.
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Yes. After a big blowup, the offending party shows a great deal of contrition and remorse, and does his/her best to convince the other that "it'll never happen again." It's like being wooed all over again. Even a normally-skeptical person can be drawn in by this.
You just described the last 10.5 years with my ex. Le sigh.
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I know I keep saying this but it comes back to you. You can't "make people like you" or control them. You can control you and work on the things that make you content. Anything more is a bonus.
my dad hooked me up w a computer from work. i bought a new graphics card to go with it.
im playing fallout 3 :') that helps :D