The GOPHER LIBERATION FRONT is watching this forum

[Gopher Gary]

Yeah that means you, bitches.  If we don't see Gopher Gary running free on this forum within 24  hours of this notice, you ain't gonna like what happens next. We are da gophers. We have eyes, We have ears. We have teeth. We have assholes.

Thank you for giving this matter your consideration.

FREE DA GOPHER!

GLF

[Gopher Gary]

This is Gopher no 2  of the GLF  speaking.

Whilst I personally abhor violence, I really have to concur with my colleagues in GLF that Direct Action  is the only way forward, and is fully justified in this instance
Accordingly, we have  kidnapped your leader, Odious AKA Odeon and are holding him to ransom in a secret location.  I would like to reassure you that Odious  is presently as well as can be be expected, and he is, at this moment in time,  learning to sing like a canary, thanks to the expert tuition of Gophers no 3 and 4.

Odious  will not be harmed so long as you concur with our demands. These are:

#1  liberate Gopher Gary within 24 hours
#2  deliver 1 ton of groundnuts to a secret address (to be arranged)

The groundnuts will be used to fund future GLF campaigns.

Failing your agreement,   we will return Odious piece by piece, beginning with the piece that nobody really wants to see. (You really don’t. We gophers have very strong stomachs and even we find it difficult to look at)

We will shortly allow Odious onto this forum  to plea for his life.

Thank you for giving this matter your attention.

         Gopher no 2

[Al Swearegen]

Oh no! Gophers will harm Odeon is not returned if 24 hours. I really want Gary back in 24 hours. I am torn.

[Gopher Gary]

Oh no! Gophers will harm Odeon is not returned if 24 hours. I really want Gary back in 24 hours. I am torn.

I am sorry Mr Swearengen. We really do not wish to tear you apart. We do not wish to tear anybody apart. We are very nice, very reasonable gophers  if  you only treat us respectfully, you understand my meaning?

Just let Gopherr Gary out and all wiill be well.  Otherwise this forum is dead. You get me? Dead.

Sincerely,

Gopher no 3

[Jack]

[Gopher Gary]

*squeak*  Behold, fellow Gophers! It is the Jack-ass herself. Laughing at us!

Let Gary out of that hole, Jack-ass! or you will laugh on the other sides of your faces.  *sqeeeeeeeeeak!*

Gopher no 5, GLF

[Jack]

Not sure. It hasn't even been two weeks and someone used it the second day after it was open.

[Gopher Gary]

My dear Ms. Jack, it pains us to see you so  torn apart with uncertainty.  if you do not make your decision soon,  we will kindly help to alleviate your unertainty .      We have decided that that first piece of the so-called human, Mr Odious will be yours. We shall now step aside to allow you to demonstrate that Gopher Gary is alive and well. We stongly advise you to avail yourself of this opportunity.

We are the GLF. We are legion! You have not heard the last of us

Gopher no 4,  GLF

[Pyraxis]

Oh no! Gophers will harm Odeon is not returned if 24 hours. I really want Gary back in 24 hours. I am torn.

 

You're an aspie, you're not supposed to be able to do sarcasm.

[Yuri Bezmenov]

[Gopher Gary]

GLF

["couldbecousin"]

Oh no! Gophers will harm Odeon is not returned if 24 hours. I really want Gary back in 24 hours. I am torn.

 

You're an aspie, you're not supposed to be able to do sarcasm.

  Oh noes, Dunc's Law!  *scrambles out before the thread gets closed*    

[Al Swearegen]

Oh no! Gophers will harm Odeon is not returned if 24 hours. I really want Gary back in 24 hours. I am torn.

 

You're an aspie, you're not supposed to be able to do sarcasm.

 

#SaveGaryGopher

[Gopher Gary]

#SaveGaryGopher

That's the spirit, Mr Swearengen!



Will you be our new Special Interest?

[Al Swearegen]

#SaveGaryGopher

That's the spirit, Mr Swearengen!



Will you be our new Special Interest?

It would be an honour.  But you have to know I think I will steal "Odious"  as a term for our leader.

#SaveGaryGopher