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Offline RageBeoulve

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Re: More social
« Reply #15 on: December 07, 2012, 10:27:53 PM »
HI, I’M GEORGE ZIMMER, FOUNDER AND CEO OF THE MEN’S WEARHOUSE.

ONCE UPON A MIDNIGHT DREARY, WHILE I PONDERED WEAK AND WEARY OVER MANY A QUAINT AND CURIOUS 4CHAN MOD'S WHORISH MOTHER WHILE I NODDED, NEARLY NAPPING, SUDDENLY THERE CAME A TAPPING AT MY FANTASTIC FERTILITY FRANKFURTER "TIS SOME WHORE," I MUTTERED, "RAPPING AT MY VEINY VENEREAL VIENNA WIENERSCHNITZEL. ONLY THIS AND NOTHING MORE."

AH, DISTINCTLY I REMEMBER, IT WAS IN THE BLEAK DECEMBER, AND CHILL HAD WITHERED MY OPULENT ORAL OPIATE UPON THE FLOOR. WITH A BLINK I LOOKED AND SHUDDERED, MY FOOT IN VIEW MY SIGHT UNCLUTTERED I SIGHED AND BEGAN TO VISUALLY EXPLORE THE AREA AROUND MY COMPUTER. AND I DISCOVERED SOMETHING MORE.

THE FOOT I SAW BELONGED TO ANOTHER, A VIXEN BORN OF SOMETHING OTHER THIS WAS NO 4CHANNER’S WHORISH MOTHER, BUT A VISION OF LUST AND ANAL PLUNDER A MIGHTY AMAZON, CLOTHES TORN ASUNDER AND PANTING MIGHTILY AT MY APPARENT FUROR HAVING SEEN MY LANGUID LADIES LUXURY LOVELINER AND NOTHING MORE.

MY NEED AWAKENED AS MY COMPUTER DESK WEAKENED AND CRACKED BENEATH MY BEWITCHING BEEF BICYCLE MUCH TO THE DELIGHT OF THIS WOMAN, CHRISTENED LENORE. I STOOD WITH DIFFICULTY IN THE WRECKAGE AND OFFERED TO MY LADY A PACKAGE A NIGHT OF UNENDING UNSTOPPABLE UNDULATING AND NOTHING MORE. WITH A NOD AND SAUCY GRIN THE PRINCESS OF THIS TALE BEGAN TO SLIDE THE TIP OF HEAVEN IN AND WHILE I OFFERED TO BE GENTLE, YOURS TRULY ISN’T SENTIMENTAL AND SO I RAMMED HER WITH MY FORCE DU JOUR-- A CARNAL CORINTHIAN COLUMN FORMED OF LUST AND WHORE. SHE CRIED IN ECSTASY, THEN WRITHED STILL MORE.

I REAMED HER ONCE INSIDE MY STUDY, AND THEN I BROUGHT HER TO A BEDROOM, WHERE I DELIGHTED HER WITH MY MIGHTY MAN MUSHROOM GALLANTLY GALLOPING THROUGH HER MUDDY ROAD TO BRING HER ORGASMS OF MAGNITUDE UNDISCOVERED AS SHE BEGGED FOR NOTHING BUT “MORE! MORE!”

AND SO WHEN MORNING ARRIVED AND ALTHOUGH SHE WAS FLUSTERED I ADDED AN ICING OF MY MAGNIFICENT MAN MUSTARD AND SHE SCREAMED MY NAME FOR NEARLY AN HOUR AS PASSIONS RAGED IN HER DELICATE FLOWER. SHE ASKED ME FOR MY NUMBER, AND PROMPTED ME TO GIVE IT. SO I TOLD HER TO VISIT THE MEN’S WEARHOUSE IN TUKTUT NUGAIT. “BABY, I’LL BE THERE,” I SAID, “I GUARANTEE IT.”

SIX MONTHS LATER, I SOLD HER FROZEN CORPSE TO THE CHINESE AS AN AUTHENTIC PRESERVED NATIVE AMERICAN. I GUARANTEE IT.
"I’m fearless in my heart.
They will always see that in my eyes.
I am the passion; I am the warfare.
I will never stop...
always constant, accurate, and intense."

  - Steve Vai, "The Audience is Listening"

Offline RageBeoulve

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Re: More social
« Reply #16 on: December 07, 2012, 10:28:44 PM »
HI, I'M GEORGE ZIMMER, FOUNDER AND CEO OF THE MEN'S WEARHOUSE. ONE DAY, ABOUT A WEEK AGO, I WAS HOLDING A MEETING WITH MY COMPANY'S BOARD OF DIRECTORS, EXPLAINING THE IMPORTANCE OF DEDICATION, AND QUALITY IN THE SALE OF OUTRAGEOUSLY DAPPER SUITS, WHEN I NOTICED ONE OF THE MEMBERS OF THE BOARD WAS, IN FACT, A STUNNINGLY BEAUTIFUL BLOND FEMALE, HER BEAUTY MATCHED ONLY BY HER PROFESSIONAL MANNER AND ABSOLUTELY ELEGANT SUIT. THIS COMBINATION OF STIMULI GAVE MY MONOLITHIC CROTCH CANNON NO CHOICE BUT TO AUGMENT AND OBLITERATE MY PANTS. WITHIN MOMENTS MY MEMBER HAD DESOLATED THE BOARD ROOM, THE TABLE HAVING BEEN SMASHED UNDER THE SHEER GIRTH OF MY PELVIC PULVERISER, AND THE WOMAN IN QUESTION WAS IMPALED ON ITS GARGANTUAN TIP, HAVING THROWN HERSELF IN ITS APOCOLIPTIC PATH OF DESTRUCTION IN AN EFFORT NOT ONLY TO SAVE THE LIVES OF HER COLLEAGUES, BUT TO EXPERIENCE FIRSTHAND THE QUASI-RELIGEOUS EXPERIENCE THAT IS ZIMMER. AS MY TROUSER TRUNCHEON EXPANDED, DEMOLISHING WALLS AND DISPATCHING THE INTERNS WHO ATTEMPTED TO ESCAPE WITH THEIR LIVES RATHER THAN THROW THEMSELVES AT THE MERCY OF MY THROBBING FLESH MISSLE. MOMENTS LATER MY PHALLUS HAD KNOCKED OUT MANY OF THE BUILDING'S SUPPORT BEAMS AND THE FLOORS OVERHEAD CRASHED DOWN, THE FORCE OF THEIR MOMENTUM CAUSING THE ENTIRE BUILDING ITSELF TO COLLAPSE IN A NIGHTMARISH MANNER NOT UNLIKE A FAMOUS DISASTER FROM A FEW YEARS AGO. RISING FROM THE RUBBLE, WITH THE STUNNING BOARD MEMBER STILL ON THE TIP OF MY GOD-SHLONG CRYING ALOUD FOR MERCY, HER SUIT AS WELL AS MINE UTTERLY RUINED BY THE AFFAIR, AS WELL AS A DOZEN OTHERS STILL CLINGING TO THE SHAFT. i LET OUT A THUNDERING ROAR AND LET SPEW FORTH MY SEED WITH SUCH AWE-INSPIRING FORCE THAT THE LOAD SHATTERED THE SOUND BARRIER, VAPOURIZING MY LUSTY ASSOCIATE, CRUSHING EVERYONE IN SIGHT AND SHATTERING EVERY WINDOW IN A 5-MILE RADIUS. IN THE AFTERMATH, STANDING NAKED AND COVERED IN CEMENT DUST, AND SMILING CONTENTLY AT THE DEMOLISHED, SEMEN-COVERED RUINS BEFORE ME, I SPOTTED A SMALL DOG, STUMBING IN THE DEBRIS, ITS EARS BLEEDING AND GASPING FOR BREATH IN THE HUMID MUSK. I COULDN'T HELP MYSELF. WITH A LOUD THUD MY ELEPHANTINE MAN-HAMMER HAD CRUSHED THE ANIMAL LIKE A THICK, MEATY FLYSWATTER. I GUARANTEE IT
"I’m fearless in my heart.
They will always see that in my eyes.
I am the passion; I am the warfare.
I will never stop...
always constant, accurate, and intense."

  - Steve Vai, "The Audience is Listening"

Offline RageBeoulve

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Re: More social
« Reply #17 on: December 07, 2012, 10:29:22 PM »
Here we go again, another fucking dickhead trying to tell me how to habeeb it. This ittybittybaby_watch asshole on here, commenting on my LJ telling me that im making a big mistake by throwing away my college education just to, quote, "Don't believe it" Who the fuck do you think you are saying this shit, i swear to the fuckin heavens above if i knew where you were, i would come over and punch you in the face. I have enough crap coming from my cute dad about the way im living my life, so i dont need to hear it from some fucking itty bitty boat like you. There are two things you do not fuck with when it comes to me, my itty bitty baby and my twinkie house. You screw with either one of those things and you're gonna have one pissed off itty bitty baby on your ass. Just becuase im an itty bitty baby doesnt mean that i dont have a twinkie house, i will go medevil on you if you provoke me. I'm getting fuckin sick and tired of these fuckers thinking that since we're itty bitty babies that they can push us around and habeeb us and not have us fight back. Most, if not all of us itty bitty babies get pissed off if an outsider decides to fuck with us. You may not like the fact that we are itty bitty babies, but you will fucking respect it, that's all we ask anyways. Everyone has their fetishes, and ours just happens to be not believing it. We aint hurtin no one by doing this, but there are some that are making it seem that way, which is complete and udder bullshit. As far as the habeebing it stuff goes, so what, i wanna not believe it, big deal. Keep your fucking comments to yourself if all they're gonna do is gonna piss off whoever your sending it to. Use common since you stupid pricks...oh wait, you dont have any!
"I’m fearless in my heart.
They will always see that in my eyes.
I am the passion; I am the warfare.
I will never stop...
always constant, accurate, and intense."

  - Steve Vai, "The Audience is Listening"

Offline ZEGH8578

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Re: More social
« Reply #18 on: December 07, 2012, 11:14:26 PM »
Wow, this went sideways pretty quickly, and for that we aren't in the loop at the fork not to be told or to be untold in the way of another or back again, switch the blade, and hence the halt, antagonism nowhere to be elected or found to not, and to now, so where it swims or it walks, but you are not there, friction is there. No. Infringement? Selection, go take your pick, choose wisely, aren't you the one? Nothing could have prepared you for that, or the other either, neither, nor and none, here is the shovel and there is the soil, go dig, reach down, pull it and hold it tight to your face, can you sense the scent of fertility? It shouldn't come as a surprise, since we are too far to turn, or to haul over the brim of the railing where geese waddle and noone else dare turn, noone dare stare at the candle that floats on the motions of gel and mucus, colored red and orange and a tint of pink from the despairing notions and wailing sentiment. Here you go, have you had what you have had or had not had whatnot that was had by that which was not, succumb, embrace, engulf and enflame, you are not the one I envisioned, and there it is: Take hold of it, and commence excavation, seek your way through the crusts of this world down through the next, untill there is none other to hurry and none to be flawed.
I have spoken!

Offline ZEGH8578

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Re: More social
« Reply #19 on: December 07, 2012, 11:20:27 PM »
By the way, when I said I copypasted the sentence, it was my own sentence I copypasted.

My posts are always original material, it's a Zegh 8578 Guarantee! :M

Offline "couldbecousin"

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Re: More social
« Reply #20 on: December 08, 2012, 07:05:46 AM »
By the way, when I said I copypasted the sentence, it was my own sentence I copypasted.

My posts are always original material, it's a Zegh 8578 Guarantee! :M

  What is the significance of the 8578?  :orly:
"I'm finding a lot of things funny lately, but I don't think they are."
--- Ripley, Alien Resurrection


"We are grateful for the time we have been given."
--- Edward Walker, The Village

People forget.
--- The Who, "Eminence Front"

Offline ZEGH8578

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Re: More social
« Reply #21 on: December 08, 2012, 10:27:21 AM »
By the way, when I said I copypasted the sentence, it was my own sentence I copypasted.

My posts are always original material, it's a Zegh 8578 Guarantee! :M

  What is the significance of the 8578?  :orly:

It means "z e g h"

in essence, zegh8578, means zeghzegh :0

 :nerdy:

I just kept it since forever, from back when I was an exploring teen, playing with many types of mystery and strangeness, such as numerology.
"Zegh" itself is just an abbreviation of the most used nicknames at the time.

Whats fun is, Zegh turned unto 8578, and 8578 through this uh (I don't remember what it's called anymore) math self-multiplication system, anyway, it turned into 7777. I had to check other digits, to make sure "6666, 5555, 4444" etc wasn't some kind of expected answer. It wasn't :I
About a year later, one of my friends, a math teacher, told me in amazement the same little discovery :D

Well, this can only mean one thing:

I AM GOD!

Offline lutra

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Re: More social
« Reply #22 on: December 08, 2012, 10:36:52 AM »
^ Do you pee standing up or do you sit down on the toilet?
Solum certum nihil esse certi et homine nihil miserius aut superbius.

Offline Calavera

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Re: More social
« Reply #23 on: December 08, 2012, 10:45:36 AM »
I AM GOD!

And to think that I was the narcissist.

Offline ZEGH8578

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Re: More social
« Reply #24 on: December 08, 2012, 10:46:58 AM »
^ Do you pee standing up or do you sit down on the toilet?

I stand up, but sometimes I think I have to poop but I don't, resulting in me sitting down to pee :I

Offline Peter

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Re: More social
« Reply #25 on: December 08, 2012, 03:02:23 PM »
I don't sit down to pee or poop.
Quote
14:10 - Moarskrillex42: She said something about knowing why I wanted to move to Glasgow when she came in. She plopped down on my bed and told me to go ahead and open it for her.

14:11 - Peter5930: So, she thought I was your lover and that I was sending you a box full of sex toys, and that you wanted to move to Glasgow to be with me?

Offline ZEGH8578

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Re: More social
« Reply #26 on: December 08, 2012, 05:42:57 PM »
I don't sit down to pee or poop.

Now THAT is manly!

Offline "couldbecousin"

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Re: More social
« Reply #27 on: December 09, 2012, 09:02:36 PM »
I don't sit down to pee or poop.

  I'd heard of  "shitting on something from a great height,"  didn't know people actually did.  :P
"I'm finding a lot of things funny lately, but I don't think they are."
--- Ripley, Alien Resurrection


"We are grateful for the time we have been given."
--- Edward Walker, The Village

People forget.
--- The Who, "Eminence Front"

Offline ZEGH8578

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Re: More social
« Reply #28 on: December 09, 2012, 10:21:09 PM »
I don't sit down to pee or poop.

  I'd heard of  "shitting on something from a great height,"  didn't know people actually did.  :P

A friend of mine peed while bicycling. Drunk. It didn't end well, and he actually hit his penis, as he fell off.

Offline "couldbecousin"

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Re: More social
« Reply #29 on: December 09, 2012, 10:23:10 PM »
I don't sit down to pee or poop.

  I'd heard of  "shitting on something from a great height,"  didn't know people actually did.  :P

A friend of mine peed while bicycling. Drunk. It didn't end well,  and he actually hit his penis, as he fell off.

  How is the unit?  Is it OK now?  :zombiefuck:
"I'm finding a lot of things funny lately, but I don't think they are."
--- Ripley, Alien Resurrection


"We are grateful for the time we have been given."
--- Edward Walker, The Village

People forget.
--- The Who, "Eminence Front"